Basschick who told you this?? Im just wondering...Quote:
Originally Posted by basschick
Somethings have been tossed around Im not very pleased about and I dont wanna be dramatic but It sometime at my age Im a very giving and loving person and I do admit Im nieve sometimes and foolish and get myself in stupid situation and make some decisions that are not good for me! That of course has nothing to do with anyone on this board Im talking about in my own personal life.... Right Now I have been away fixing right things that went wrong and getting back to my roots.. for along time now I havent been doing things for me and I was on a bad path of super destruction... Slowly losing more and more of myself and this is all my fault of course and no one else they where my decisions and Im an adult but! Thank GOD! I realized where I was messing up!! Right now Im getting back to me the real KELLY!
I feel better and better everyday right now and things are getting better... right now im taking time out for me spending time with love and happiness and other interests I have as well.... I miss my old self and I dont wanna loose it.. Im loving good guy... super sweet and smart and I dont need drugs and people lying or decieving me ,, tricking or confusing me ,... there is so much confusion I had there for awhile and now it is seeming to go away ... I need a clear head and a new blank piece of paper to draw out a new clearer happier and healthier life plan... This is the time to fix wrongs and make them right and make my life right for me and everyone around me who cares.. this doesnt mean Im not going to work in the industry anymore it just means I need to time to fix myself and find myself again... Cause I dont like the person I was turning intoo... I know alot of my friend see the outer part of me still and know Im a sweet good guy!! But also alot of my friend who truly cared about me have took me aside and I mean alot of my friends who I truly respect have took my aside and shown me some things that werent so flattering and they wherent me!!
So Im healing and making myself whole... Again I usually have tons of confidence and walk with stride ,,, I show love in my face and gestures... For people who saw me at this years Las Vegas Internext I just was not me... and it was a good experience for me cause I learned alot and alot of people where there for me and I thank you for that!
This board has had amazing support for me and I care about all of you alot.. and not matter what you know what actions and person I have shown you I'am and I can be and that is what I should mean to you.. Cause that is what Im about...
Thanks GWW AND EVERYONE HERE .. You have taught me alot and alot of people on here have shown me things that I could never learn or gain anywhere else... There is so many unique amazing minds and souls on here and Im glad to know you.... I hope in the future we get to continue to know eachother... Maybe in other ways .. Who knows what will happen in the future... The reason why Im saying all of this and some of you may not care and some of you may... I wanted to explain my dissappearing and my lack of being on the board... These are my thoughts and how my heart and mind feels right now and I finally know what I need for myself... Drugs and sex not included for the time being!
I NEED TO BE HAPPY WITH MYSELF BEFORE I CAN LOVE ME AND BEFORE I CAN LOVE SOMEONE ELSE... I CAN LOVE MY FRIENDS BUT NOT THAT WAY THAT I NEED AND WANT TO AND THIS MEANS I NEED TO MAKE MYSELF HAPPY WITH ME TO MAKE MY FRIENDS TRULY HAPPY WITH ME AS WELL.. I know many of you may think that everything is just fine and yeah it pretty much is but deep down I didnt feel ok... I felt like crying all the time and just crawling into a ball and hiding....
I mean Im still the same loving,., smiling,, guy if I would have continued the way I was I would have lost and people who really cared saw me losing it as well as others.. it is scary how... unhappyness can rip your soul apart and your true self and turn you into what you HATE EHHHH???
Anyways I love you and Im doing really well and Im feel so much happier doing things for me and my life and finally feeling good about my everyday choices and replanning and getting my life into a positive loving direction that is going to accent and fullfill my future... I know some people arent very happy with these decisions but if they really cared about me they would be happy for me... But thats life... I dont care if anyone trys to rip me apart and try and make me look bad cause I will ignore it and not pay attention and I have no evil or malicious intent towards anyone.. I WISH EVERYONE IN HERE THE BEST IN EVERYTHING AND ANYTHING THEY DO!!!
Anyways Im going to go for now ... I know this prolly sounds like lots of sobbing and bullshit but it is for real and it is what I need and want and I feel like I had to explain it to everyone... who cares. or what interested in knowing....
Everyone in there lifetime has a different path LOL some of my friends are drug users and some are liquor whores... some are LAWYERS * WINKS * AND some are smut peddlers,,,... some are sluts and some are whores ... some are even rentboys which I love very much!! But that doesnt make me not like them hell I have drag queen and tranny friends LOL and I love them cause there all different! This is my path for now and this the decisions I have made for me and I hope everyone understands and respects my wishes...
NOW THIS DOESNT MEAN I WONT BE GOING TO SHOW OR WHO KNOWS I MAY DO PORN AGAIN OR WHO KNOWS WHAT WILL HAPPEN BUT... Back to my point I really didnt dissappear it is more of a saving " SAVING KELLY TAYLOR"
Type thing and yeah I did take some risks ... But guess what they where worth it... and I dont regret trying to fix my life and wish that the people who are mad about it wouldnt be cause.... I do no wish anything bad upon anyone in this world!
Ok im going.. Tired and I promise next time I will be back with my dirty, trashy, skanky little mouth but for the time being Im being alittle down to earth and showing the not so naked side of me,.... sometimes it is ok to show what you are inside and out and what is underneathe your cloths like my HUGE 20'' INCH UNCUT COCK!! LOL right hehe it is more like 8'' inches but that is ok SHHHH dont tell chad he might not want to bottom for me anymore hahahaha anyways this is just alittle deep talk and to clear up all the bullshit behind the quote un quote dissappearance of me...
There doesnt need to be anyone taking messages for me... If they wanna get ahold of me alot of people know my email and if not please tell them to just email me the email is kkellyttaylor@aim.com thanks alot! Love to all....
Your Friend,
Kelly Taylor
Also anyone who is trying to contact me through PM or Email give me sometime to respond .. Im having someone do this for me at this time... Also such friends like boyfunk / brandon etc... Please let me get some stuff done before Im able to do some things for and with you Im not mad and please dont be mad there is no reason to get angry you are my friends and guess what Im happy , happier than I have ever been in along time and anyone who truly cares would be happy for me ( If there is some things u need address I would like to know what they are so feel free to PM I will get back ASAP but futher more ) ... I feel like a HUGE weight has been lifted from me and I feel amazing and for me to continue growing and learning as a person there is somethings I need to do .. I hope you understand.. I know anyone who is really my friend will... I dont want problems and if you anyone does have something to say feel free to email me and please dont sugar coat anything cause I dont like it... But much love to everyone and thanks for all the love and ongoing support alot of you have shown .... and continue to show
