Resumes, cover letters

OK, maybe I'm too old-fashioned. Or maybe it's just a sign of not only the times, but also of the industry we're in. And I don't mean the adult industry, but a technology-based industry.

But I've noticed over the course of the last few years while hiring new people that so many of the resumes I see are so poorly put together. The cover letters, most of all, are horrible as well. Most have typos or poor grammar, missing punctuation, or are just extremely short - as in "hey saw ur job post heres my resume thx call me".

Is it just because, being an internet-based business, we hire lots of tech-type people who are used to the informal nature of IMs, emails and forums/boards such as this one? Granted, a programmer should just be able to write code extremely well, not necessarily essays and cover letters.

But when I see a cover letter like that I just assume they raced through monster.com clicking on every posting they figured looked good, hoping a couple would result in a response, and didn't actually read or pay much attention to any.

Moreover, when I see resumes and cover letters like that I just can't help but think the person doesn't care enough about the job, or at the very least care enough about projecting and giving off this impression of thoughtfulness, thoroughness and responsibility. I think "slacker" and pass them by. A good cover letter grabs my attention more than their list of qualifications.

So... am I just outdated? Should I get over it? How about you guys? In jobs you've applied for in the past, did you stick to the traditional rules regarding resume format, cover letter format and so forth? I know when I applied for jobs I'd write individual cover letters for each application, specifically addressing what the posting asked for. I'd even modify resumes to specifically address that job (so my accomplishments or objectives would be specific to that job). If I applied for 50 jobs that day, I'd have written 50 cover letters and 50 resumes and put lots of effort in to each. Not just written "hey heres my resume" and hit "submit".

I've tried both ways, and had infinitely more success when I spend time to make it more formal. You're right that electronic communication tends to be informal, so that when people send anything by email, they tend to be more informal as well, apparently under the impression that the paradigm has shifted.

However, you make a good point that if you care about a job, you will spend time to work on making a good resume and cover letter.

I don't think it's outdated. It just makes sense. $0.02

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Originally Posted by CorbinFisher_BD

I know when I applied for jobs I'd write individual cover letters for each application, specifically addressing what the posting asked for. I'd even modify resumes to specifically address that job (so my accomplishments or objectives would be specific to that job). If I applied for 50 jobs that day, I'd have written 50 cover letters and 50 resumes and put lots of effort in to each.

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Same experience here

If you really want the job you taylor your resume for the position and submit an individual cover letter.

First impression is important and most times your impression is your cover letter and resume. This is just my experience/practice in the corporate world. I have a hunch the adult sector is a bit less formal in certain circumstances.

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Originally Posted by CorbinFisher_BD

OK, maybe I'm too old-fashioned. Or maybe it's just a sign of not only the times, but also of the industry we're in.

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I don't think so. I've found pretty consistently that people with sloppy cover letters and/or resumes are generally sloppy in their work. I mean, if someone can't get it together to produce an error-free letter and resume when applying for a job, when they are supposed to be making the best possible impression, it's probably not someone we want to hire.

Yes, I probably rule out some people who might otherwise be qualified with that stance, but I've consistently found that we are pretty much wasting our time when we interview people who send sloppy, short, or unprofessional emails/resumes/letters.

The other thing that bugs me is when we put out a Craigslist ad that is very detailed and clear, and says that, although we're an adult company, we're no different than any other business, run a completely professional work environment, and expect the same... and then people persist in telling us about how they are a stripper, or an escort, or like to get nasty with this or that, or whatever... when the job they are applying for has NO BEARING on that sort of thing.

We almost blew off a graphic designer we were considering because he seemed more excited about where he could see our porn than about what we needed from him in terms of design.

I dunno. I think the workforce is, in general, a lot less committed, and probably less educated and competent than it was 20 years ago. But I'll be damned if I'll lower the standards of what we need in an employee because of it.

these are people on a computer who work on computers who can't be bothered to use spellcheck, and how much trouble is it to push a button in order to make a good impression on someone you hope will pay you? makes you wonder what else they won't bother to do if they get the job.

Resumes are SOOOoooo 1980's corporate.

Didnt you know that post count is the most important thing these days?

Regards,

Lee

He who talks the loudest is most often heard $0.02

I don’t know about this stuff never created a resume in my life, but my guess is that I would read it a few times before printing it. That said I am sure I would not be the best at creating something like that, can you imagine how orderly an accountants resume would look? Well I would have to say I would be on the opposite end of that scale for sure. :pirate:

here's my question to you. if you were going for a job you REALLY wanted to get, wouldn't you use spellcheck on your cover letter or resume? in fact, i bet you would pm me or someone like me and ask us to go over it for you - and someone would.

that little bit of effort is more effort than the guys sending out these resumes and coverletters go through.

shoot, for $50 you can pay someone to make your resume. sure, that's the very low end of the resume spectrum but if you can use a search engine you can find someone to do this. it won't be a great resume but at least it won't actively suck.

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Originally Posted by maxpower

He who talks the loudest is most often heard $0.02

I don’t know about this stuff never created a resume in my life, but my guess is that I would read it a few times before printing it. That said I am sure I would not be the best at creating something like that, can you imagine how orderly an accountants resume would look? Well I would have to say I would be on the opposite end of that scale for sure. :pirate:

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That's entirely right, Patti. Hell, with most word processing programs you not only have spellchecker, but you have resume templates and even cover letter templates that outline for you just how your resume should look and what it should cover.

Do a Google search online and you can find a million different sample resumes and cover letters and templates and format guides, all of which are so similar as to make it quite clear how a resume and cover letter should look.

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Originally Posted by Lazer

However, you make a good point that if you care about a job, you will spend time to work on making a good resume and cover letter.

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That's the key. Obviously, finding a new job is a very important step and something that matters a great deal to the potential employee, as well as the company seeking to bring someone on board. So if someone just can't be bothered to care about putting effort in to the cover letter/resume, just how much do they actually care about the job?!

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Originally Posted by Squirt

If you really want the job you taylor your resume for the position and submit an individual cover letter.

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Precisely!!!!

It seems hardly anyone does that anymore, though!

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Originally Posted by basschick

here's my question to you. if you were going for a job you REALLY wanted to get, wouldn't you use spellcheck on your cover letter or resume? in fact, i bet you would pm me or someone like me and ask us to go over it for you - and someone would.

that little bit of effort is more effort than the guys sending out these resumes and coverletters go through.

shoot, for $50 you can pay someone to make your resume. sure, that's the very low end of the resume spectrum but if you can use a search engine you can find someone to do this. it won't be a great resume but at least it won't actively suck.

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I am sure I would your right, this whole thing is weird to me though. How many gay porn companies really ask for a “real” resume now or ever, less that 30 for sure right?

Its hard for me to imagine the need for such skilled people to keep a dozen or less members sites going. I can see the photographers, and the site owner (many times now days they are the same person) needing to be on the higher end. But I am not sure playing Simon Says, deserves more than what 30,000 a year, and their resume skills would not be my biggest worry. I would care how long they where with their last job, and so forth. How much money they made before, if they where cute LOL, if they are house trained stuff like that :D

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Originally Posted by gaybucks_chip

I dunno. I think the workforce is, in general, a lot less committed, and probably less educated and competent than it was 20 years ago. But I'll be damned if I'll lower the standards of what we need in an employee because of it.

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That's what I'm starting to fear as well.

I think the informal nature of the modern age has led a lot of people to underestimate the value of communication skills.

There was a stand up comedian who did a hilarious routine based on his having watched one of those Civil War documentaries where they voiced over excerpts from letters soldiers had written to loved ones back home. "My dearest Dahlila, oh how my heart strains with every day passing in which I'm not in your arms. This brutal war, sickens me so, and I fear I shall not ever return to our beloved home, at least as the innocent man I once was."

vs.

what a modern day letter from Iraq would sound like... "IT'S MUTHAFUCKIN HOT HERE! SHIT! WTF!?! GET ME OUTTA HERE B4 I FUCK SOME SHIT UP. ttyl kthx!!!!"

Reminds me of resumes/cover letters these days where people just don't appreciate the value of presentation in written communication.

It doesn't just bother me that someone sent in such a poorly written cover letter (if any at all). It bothers me that they felt there was no need to send a well-written one. That it didn't matter. That no one would care. That it wasn't necessary. That it needn't be done. How'd they get to thinking that?!

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Originally Posted by maxpower

I am sure I would your right, this whole thing is weird to me though. How many gay porn companies really ask for a “real” resume now or ever, less that 30 for sure right?
:D

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If they're not looking for real resumes they should perhaps rethink that. It's one thing to hire someone you already have an existing relationship with and know well, and thus are willing to bypass the formalities of resume submission. But when hiring new people you don't know and really bringing in someone from the outside, I can't imagine not asking for resumes.

Good writing should never be underestimated. I see countless paysites out there with poorly written copy full of typos, run-on sentences and heinously bad grammar and can't imagine ever signing up for one because it's obviously a half-ass operation. What does it convey to your users when the person responding to their e-mails can barely forumale a sentence? How about when you try and establish relationships with other webmasters?

People do appreciate the ability to write. Everytime I properly use a semicolon in the update writeups on our sites - I shit you not - I get at least a half dozen emails from people who comment on it and mention how refreshing it is to see a semicolon. lol.

Most of all, though, as an employer, what kind of impression do you receive from someone who can't write or express ideas in words? It goes far beyond simply conveying informality. It makes an impression on a broad scale.

You guys really work in office building someplace with ties on, office plants, baseball teams, 401k, and all that? I would be worried about supporting all that on a web-site, even one as good as yours. Sometimes sites are more like TV shows or something, they can run really hot and cold. I would just hate to have to downsize, I did not really think their was enough money in this to grow so big. Gay Corporate Porn? :signhere:

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Originally Posted by maxpower

You guys really work in office building someplace with ties on, office plants, baseball teams, 401k, and all that? I would be worried about supporting all that on a web-site, even one as good as yours. Sometimes sites are more like TV shows or something, they can run really hot and cold. I would just hate to have to downsize, I did not really think their was enough money in this to grow so big. Gay Corporate Porn? :signhere:

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Business is business. Don't let yourself risk becoming too complacent thinking it isn't real business we're engaged in here!

Sure, there are nice things about the business we're in - it being so people oriented, informal, having flexible work hours, a casual working environment, so on so forth. But any company assumes obligations towards its customers, as well as its employees, to run itself in an effective manner. There are tried and true aspects of running a business that are in place not because of some archaic and oppressive tradition, but because they just work well and are conducive to a company's being productive and profitable. Well-presented resumes as a means to getting a good impression of whether or not a potential employee is qualified to work for you are among them.

And yes, we do offer 401k. As well as a very extensive benefits package including fully covered medical, dental, vision, life insurance, paid vacations and so forth. For fulltime employees and models! :)

How many full-time people not counting models (that only do model work) do you guy have on your “team” I guess that might be a secret or something but we can say a ballpark number for some of the bigger gay companies like your site, Bad Puppy, JUB, people like that. Because you guys have to be about the largest in the world, just makes me wonder how large that really is.

Its really cool to see that a gay company can take such good care of its people, shame more people are not able to do as much.

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Originally Posted by maxpower

How many full-time people not counting models (that only do model work) do you guy have on your “team” I guess that might be a secret or something but we can say a ballpark number for some of the bigger gay companies like your site, Bad Puppy, JUB, people like that. Because you guys have to be about the largest in the world, just makes me wonder how large that really is.

Its really cool to see that a gay company can take such good care of its people, shame more people are not able to do as much.

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hehe well we don't reveal the exact number of fulltime employees. That's confidential.

But I do think it extremely important companies take care of their employees. A lot of companies out there never realize their full potential because, rather than being a business, they're just the owner's bank account, essentially. Rather than reinvesting in to the business, the owner(s) leaves a bare minimum behind for operating expenses - cheap hosting, underpaid employees, underpaid models, so on so forth - and spends everything on themselves.

Don't get me wrong - an owner is entitled to do that if they so choose. And some people have no desire to run a full company and just want to have fun and make good money. Many choose to limit a company's activities to that which they're able to handle themselves, almost entirely, with minimal staff and support. More power to them. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. There are a lot of individual webmasters on this board who don't have employees but are extremely successful because that's the model they've chosen to work with and have done very well at it.

Hiring new people can be a nerveracking experience. You're bringing a complete stranger in to the inner workings of your company and trusting them with a great deal. That's why resumes and cover letters are so important, as are the impressions put forth during the interview. It's your one and only chance to gauge someone before placing a great deal of trust and responsibility in them (well, that and the background check. lol).

We expect a great deal out of the people working with us here, and in return it's only right we offer them a great deal in terms of pay, freedom, respect, bonuses, benefits, so forth. There was a point in time at which Corbin took on a great deal of responsibility towards employees and their families (we have employees with spouses and children who depend on the health of this company and the right decisions being made) as well as became dependent upon those employees to keep the ship afloat and running fullsteam ahead. It's a mutual arrangement.

I can see that working I guess in 5 or 6 person teams + some models but much more than that is beyond anything I could see a need for. Even 5 people that are not creating content themselves is more that anyone would have a need for right? Unless you guys are running some Chinese Porn Sweatshop someplace cranking out FHG's or something. But hey I don’t really know everything :fucked:

In the same vein as the above discussions about resumes and cover letters, one of the other requests we've sometimes made in our job postings is something to the effect of

"When you respond, write and tell us why we should consider hiring you. Give us something to help us understand a little about you. It can be somewhat informal, but something that conveys your personality, interests, goals... anything that would help us get to know you. What we DON'T want is a generic cover letter your resume guy produced."

And, even with that, it's amazing how we will get a generic cover letter with a couple words or a sentence changed. I don't know whether it's because people don't read the ad carefully, or are just completely flummoxed over writing something original and unusual, but it always surprises me how few applicants can even read the directions.

Now... we probably wouldn't put that sort of touchy-feely thing for a programmer, but for a marketing person, or for an assistant to AJ and I, or a person that's going to be doing creatives like web design or video editing, it really has made a difference in cutting down the time we spend interviewing. Usually we can review the applications, talk to 2 or 3 people, interview one or two, and be done with the hiring process.

Skills and talents are, of course, crucial... but for a company with a dozen employees or less, personality, ability to interact with others, commitment and integrity, are for us at least as important, and sometimes more so, than the technical abilities.

hehe Chip I know what you mean.

Our postings will specifically ask for resume with cover letter, in MS Word format, for example. And someone will send just a resume, no cover letter, as text within an email. o.O

What kind of impression does that make?

max, i've been offered 8 jobs in the last year and a half. all are in offices, all offer benefits, all were just like jobs in other industries. whenever i go to webmasters lunches, most of the people who come ARE employees who work in offices with other employees and all that stuff. gigacash, worldwidecontent, maxpixels/randyblue, flashcash, epoch and even avn are just a few of the l.a. companies who have normal offices and generally request resumes when hiring.

i have seen over 50 employee wanted ads on the boards in the last year alone, and every one asked for - at the least - a REAL resume and salary requirements.

I'm right along with Brian and Chip. I want the cover letter to include salary requirements and in the body of an email. I want the resume to be in Word.

However, just like chip said, i'm not going to be that stringent for a web developer or programmer. Though, our current IT Director did submit everything proper so that proves you could expect even the tech geeks to pull it together properly.

We're moving to a more corporate working enviroment over the years. Sooner or later you find yourself dealing with termination and unemployment and unless you have specific policies in place you're fucked as an employer. So yeah corporate gay porn is HOT :)

But when corporate comes its a bonus to employees in a lot of ways. Generally, I think employees like structure. In fact they need it in order to operate successfully. Also, We offer great benefits that you'd expect from any other established employer... health care, vision, dental, a 401k, paid holidays, paid sick days, paid vacation days and tuition reimbursement.

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Originally Posted by maxpower

You guys really work in office building someplace with ties on, office plants, baseball teams, 401k, and all that? I would be worried about supporting all that on a web-site, even one as good as yours. (snip)
I did not really think their was enough money in this to grow so big. Gay Corporate Porn? :signhere:

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Smart business owners, regardless of whether they are running a multinational pharmaceutical giant or a gay porn company, are always looking ahead, anticipating risks and changes in the business, and doing their best to mitigate the risks and diversify their revenue streams.

I've always viewed the adult online business as volatile.

As an industry, the online adult companies are better than 60% reliant on one single entity, the Visa cardmember association. Mastercard, Discover, and the smaller players represent a small chunk of the total processing volume, and I believe that AmEx prohibits porn entirely. What this means is if Visa suddenly decided to stop processing for adult -- which they could definitely do if they so desired -- revenues from adult websites would almost vanish overnight.

Likewise, if the two major banks who are underlying processors for Epoch and CCBill suddenly stopped processing adult (as many others have) or, even more likely, were acquired by Chase or First Data, both of whom prohibit porn, most everyone in the industry would be shit out of luck.

On the physical product side, downloadable DVDs will most likely marginalize the sales of physical product within a few years.

So... a smart business owner is aware of those things, and constantly is looking for strategies to minimize their risk, or at least spread it around by diversifying their revenue streams into related areas.

I don't think that it's wise for a high-revenue company in any field to limit their revenue streams to one form of business; diversification is key. So in that way, maybe Max is right that being *just* a corporate porn company is on the risky side. But I do believe there are ways to limit that risk.

i don't think porn is any riskier than any other business.

because arie works in manufacturing and my parents worked in aerospace, i've seen how many companies were taken over or went out of business with economic shifts. even more, the fact that work outsourced to china and india is not only cheaper but is on time - being on time is very rare with products made within the u.s. - a lot more large companies are going with outsourcing. the local places in burbank where there was a lot of manufacturing started going out of business when lockheed left years ago.

large movie and music companies are being very slow to adapt and are losing huge amounts of revenue, not only to file sharing changes in how we deal with our entertainment. also those who want to sell in bulk at places like walmart have to cut their profits to the bone.

how about retail? thousands of retail stores are being put out of business or are seeing their profits grow smaller and smaller because they can't possibly compete with prices at walmart or target. not to mention we can now shop competitively on the internet and also get a much wider variety of products.

we live in a time of fast change and only those businesses that can evolve and adapt quckly will thrive - no matter what type of business they are.

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Originally Posted by basschick

i don't think porn is any riskier than any other business.

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You're absolutely correct; I probably wasn't clear. The main point of my comment was that one can do risk mitigation in any business, and online porn, because it has a couple of crucial places (notably payment processing) that are the most vulnerable to interruption, requires thought about ways to minimize that risk.

The online gambling people relying on US traffic essentially went out of business overnight, and the people that make carbon paper laughed when Xerox said that their business would eventually vanish. Kodak scoffed for years at digital imaging, convinced that it would never impact their business before aggressively moving into digital imaging. Agfa (the German equivalent of Kodak) wasn't so lucky and saw their revenues plummet and their 80 year old business go bankrupt.

The only gas station for about a 4 mile radious in the area where I live (which charges about 30 cents more per gallon than the going rate) just had a 20 pump Safeway station open across the street at below-market prices.

Nearly every business has a lot of risks attached. I guess the only real difference in the adult industry is we don't have many governmental or otherwise influential people standing up to help us in times of need, so we have to take more responsibility to look out for ourselves.

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Originally Posted by basschick

i bet you would pm me or someone like me and ask us to go over it for you - and someone would.

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heh... I find this funny for some odd reason. And how much is this service?

to run my eye over someone's resume for 3 minutes isn't a paid service. it's part of being a community member :)

to rewrite all the text - not changing the shape of the resume - is $40 an hour,same as my editing / proofreading services.

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Originally Posted by IdolKnights

heh... I find this funny for some odd reason. And how much is this service?

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Originally Posted by basschick

max, i've been offered 8 jobs in the last year and a half. all are in offices, all offer benefits, all were just like jobs in other industries. whenever i go to webmasters lunches, most of the people who come ARE employees who work in offices with other employees and all that stuff. gigacash, worldwidecontent, maxpixels/randyblue, flashcash, epoch and even avn are just a few of the l.a. companies who have normal offices and generally request resumes when hiring.

i have seen over 50 employee wanted ads on the boards in the last year alone, and every one asked for - at the least - a REAL resume and salary requirements.

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I normally think about other sites being run by one person or maybe at the most 3 while only paying other EMP’s to create and star in content only. I guess I should get around more, I have just been one of those guys working in their basement or something. This whole structured or traditional office working environment and porn combination is just alien to me I guess, also this might be one of the reasons I like it too.

It is really nice to see so many gay companies are able to take care of their EMP’s, and have created what sounds like a fun atmosphere to work in. Its also really cool that so many sites are about be break-out of the 3-5 team mold I talked about, but I sounds I am more behind than I thought. I really need to crank stuff up I guess :uhoh:

(I don't think porn is any riskier than any other business)

I don’t know about all that, is it riskier than working for a TV show NO, but I would think its much more risky for EMP’s than working for Bank A or something. Porn sites come and go, any affiliate knows how quick a site can stop making sales in the numbers they used to. Its rare for sites to last 10years really just like TV shows, and after 20 years of “new” episodes of Survivor or American Idol they just lose something. I hate to tell people this, but all sites will in the end become stale as far as most viewers are concerned and will die a lonely death. :borg: This would worry me allot before I went out and got 20 EMP's or something because today and yesterday I could afford it

The only way to keep going is creating New sites in the long run, and creating new sites that are as popular or even more popular than the last ones are not all ways so easy to do once you have reached a certain level.

interesting you chose a bank. my uncle has been a banker for over 20 years and my daughter for 5 and her bf is a bank manager in a different chain of banks.

for years, banks have constantly been bought and sold. that causes management changes that lead to personnel changes. departments are being downsized or closed down entirely. a lot of banks now use temps so when the going gets tough, they can let them go without any unemployment. the economy is hitting banks - some are sharing managers between 2 branches, which means some managers are out of work. others are making people work longer hours, which means they need less employees.

our impression of certain businesses may be that they are secure and steady but the reality is often something else again.

I could live with out Epoch and CCBill to tell the truth, I think something like that would open doors for me as I feed off the carcasses of all the dead sites :pirate: God I am Bad

But if Visa decides we are not worth the effort then, ya were FUCKED. That would really have to be the nightmare scenario, if I hard the money diversifying would be a good idea. This whole thing is extremely volatile and competitive but that’s the fun part.:D

Would love to know how you could get around Visa shutting down our accounts? I guess it would not involve adult sites at all, or maybe just download sites, or the OLD fashion DVD in the mail. I guess we would have to see what room Visa gave up to wiggle. :fucked:

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Originally Posted by gaybucks_chip

Smart business owners, regardless of whether they are running a multinational pharmaceutical giant or a gay porn company, are always looking ahead, anticipating risks and changes in the business, and doing their best to mitigate the risks and diversify their revenue streams.

I've always viewed the adult online business as volatile.

As an industry, the online adult companies are better than 60% reliant on one single entity, the Visa cardmember association. Mastercard, Discover, and the smaller players represent a small chunk of the total processing volume, and I believe that AmEx prohibits porn entirely. What this means is if Visa suddenly decided to stop processing for adult -- which they could definitely do if they so desired -- revenues from adult websites would almost vanish overnight.

Likewise, if the two major banks who are underlying processors for Epoch and CCBill suddenly stopped processing adult (as many others have) or, even more likely, were acquired by Chase or First Data, both of whom prohibit porn, most everyone in the industry would be shit out of luck.

On the physical product side, downloadable DVDs will most likely marginalize the sales of physical product within a few years.

So... a smart business owner is aware of those things, and constantly is looking for strategies to minimize their risk, or at least spread it around by diversifying their revenue streams into related areas.

I don't think that it's wise for a high-revenue company in any field to limit their revenue streams to one form of business; diversification is key. So in that way, maybe Max is right that being *just* a corporate porn company is on the risky side. But I do believe there are ways to limit that risk.

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Originally Posted by basschick

interesting you chose a bank. my uncle has been a banker for over 20 years and my daughter for 5 and her bf is a bank manager in a different chain of banks.

for years, banks have constantly been bought and sold. that causes management changes that lead to personnel changes. departments are being downsized or closed down entirely. a lot of banks now use temps so when the going gets tough, they can let them go without any unemployment. the economy is hitting banks - some are sharing managers between 2 branches, which means some managers are out of work. others are making people work longer hours, which means they need less employees.

our impression of certain businesses may be that they are secure and steady but the reality is often something else again.

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This is true no company it 100% secure, but the whole Tec Industry in known for Boom and Bust cycles and really porn sites in general magnify this many times. I don’t know if I would be working at “Nate’s Sports Bar” ether if was that worried about long term stability.

You want a safe business, go into toilet paper or funerals. Everyone needs to shit sometimes, and everyone dies :cowboy:

Brian - Consider adding this book to your Amazon Wishlist

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedi...0px-ES%26L.png

A fantastic book with a witty title, which is derived from the following joke:

A panda walks into a café. He orders a sandwich, eats it, then draws a gun and proceeds to fire it at the other patrons.

“Why?” asks the confused, surviving waiter amidst the carnage, as the panda makes towards the exit. The panda produces a badly punctuated wildlife manual and tosses it over his shoulder.

“Well, I'm a panda,” he says at the door. “Look it up.”

The waiter turns to the relevant entry in the manual and, sure enough, finds an explanation. “Panda. Large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China. Eats, shoots and leaves.”

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eats,_Shoots_&_Leaves

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Originally Posted by gaybucks_chip

You want a safe business, go into toilet paper or funerals. Everyone needs to shit sometimes, and everyone dies :cowboy:

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Did think about becoming a Baptist Preacher when I was a kid for about the same reasons. But I guess that dream died really quick :shorthair:

haha I like it already.

[QUOTE=desslock;188106]Brian - Consider adding this book to your Amazon Wishlist

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedi...0px-ES%26L.png

I own this, bought it at a quirky bookstore in Santa Fe this summer. GREAT book. Not only very informative on issues I've always been a little funny on, but full of wonderful anecdotes and written in a lighthearted way.

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Originally Posted by CorbinFisher_BD

haha I like it already.

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Re: the book, btw hehe