How to say you work in porn without saying you work in porn

If I don't want to disclose that I work for pornography companies I usually will just say that I work for internet marketing and distribution companies but I cannot disclose the identity of my clients. This only works because I am a lawyer.

A woman I work with told her mother that she "is marketing indie films" which I thought was very creative.

So mom asks her "do you think you might be able to star in any of them??"

and her reply was "No mom, they have professionals to do the acting"



I love it~

:tongue:

when i used to live in Los Angeles, i used to say "i work in the entertainment industry", which is the same line that every single person in Los Angeles uses.

now, i say "i work at a notable men's interest website".

Are you kidding?

My favorite thing to do is look people right in the eye and say "I make porn."

I told my old Aunt Jennifer that.

I told my land lord, the motorcycle salesman and the little Asian woman who does my pedicures. She doesn't speak English, but I still told her.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Jasun

Are you kidding?

My favorite thing to do is look people right in the eye and say "I make porn."

I told my old Aunt Jennifer that.

I told my land lord, the motorcycle salesman and the little Asian woman who does my pedicures. She doesn't speak English, but I still told her.

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yeah, but if i say "I make porn." to the hot mormon missionary boys that come to my front door, then they run away and i don't have time to seduce them :)

See, that's where you're wrong... then they stick around longer out of curiosity.
:luke: :bunnypancake:

But what if the ugly sweaty guy sitting next to you on a 3 hour plane ride asks what you do, and you really really do not want to talk? And you KNOW that he would pop a chubby if you say _anything_ about porn, plus you know he wants to talk your ear off for no other reason than you drew the short straw to end up sitting next to him??

I'm a biker with a shaved head, covered in tattoos and I wear a "God Hates Us All" T-shirt I got at the Slayer show last year.

NOBODY wants to sit next to me on a plane let alone talk to me.

If someone asks and I don't want them to know, I say "I sell internet traffic". Seems to work well. But for the most part, I usually proudly say "I sell porn, gay porn to be specific". :)

--Chubbs

Oh, Jasun, you SO undersell yourself :)

AJ and I ran into this multiple times per day several years ago when we were both, separately looking to buy houses. We were going to open houses and about half the time AJ would get "Oh, what grade are you in?" And then, when they figured out he was a hot prospect, the next question was invariably "What do you do that you can afford to buy a house." We would both just say "We're IT workers involved in Internet and affiliate marketing" and if people would ask for more details, we'd explain how affiliate marketing works... without mentioning that we're the sponsor and that it's porn.

Occasionally when he's out somewhere, somebody will ask, he'll just say "Porn, and I'd rather not discuss it."

My bf tells ALL his friends straight and gay that i "do" porn. Some want to "see" others want a PW!

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Jasun

Are you kidding?

My favorite thing to do is look people right in the eye and say "I make porn."

I told my old Aunt Jennifer that.

I told my land lord, the motorcycle salesman and the little Asian woman who does my pedicures. She doesn't speak English, but I still told her.

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I do the same..... Why not? They all look at it..... Someone has to make it.. Why shouldn't it be me?

Most of the time, it just depends on whether I actually a.) Have time to discuss it, or b.) care to get into an involved discussion over it.

If I don't want to get into it at the time, I give the standard - "I'm an Accounts Manager for website that deals with internet marketing"

When I have time/care to explain it, I get to drop the bomb and watch the straight boys get jealous, and the girls blush and giggle. The gay boys generally want to get in on it.

I've coined the phrase, "I don't make porn - I sell it. I'm just a porn-peddler, really," generally used in response to someone asking if I'm talent.

There's 3 levels of how much I divulge. The basic dismissive one line answer I'll sometimes give is "internet marketing, consulting and sales".

If they want to know more I tell them I'm the VP of a webmaster resource company, I put together a trade show and I do marketing and consulting on the side for an attorney and other ventures.

Then if that doesn't pacify them or I feel they can handle the info... "I'm an online porn industry executive."

I'm a computer programmer.

What kind?

Internet programming.

Who do you work for?

I work for myself. I have websites that generate income for me.

What kind?

For pretty much anyone who's not family i'll say porn, For family i say:
"Internet Marketing and Promotions for a small production company." which usually has them zoning out by the time i finish the title. Once my aunt asked my the website and I told her it was blocked in the US due to crazy EU regulations.... :develish:

There's nothing better than watching people casually ask what you do.... and you answer them truthfully.

...especially when I'm at a bar and I've had some drinks too. There's my Friday night, right there.

...oh, and an ever better combination is to be at the bar, and it is a guy hitting on me... and then answer them truthfully. It typically knocks them completely off their move, and they end up going away.

Steve

"The truth is hard to swallow" - Karen Finley

Sometimes i'm straight forward about it (like desslock after a few drinks, haha), but for the most part I start gradually and go from there...

i'll start with "internet marketing" or "internet media"...

but i think most of the people i meet are pervs, cuz their mind automatically goes to... "Oh, Porn?" to which i giggle and say yes. :cheekymonkey:

I'm usually upfront unless I'm talking to someone who I need to be concerned about a bad reaction, like the person at the bank dealing with my account, or someone preparing food for me. Sometimes I'll say, "I'm in the adult industry", depending on who I'm talking to, and sometimes I'll just say "I work in porn". One time I was having brunch with friends when actress Sally Kirkland randomly sat down at our table (only in Hollywood does this kind of thing happen to people). She thought my friend was her masseur. Anyway, she stuck around and had a nice conversation with us and when I told her I worked in the "adult industry" she happily shouted out, "Oh, you work in PORN! How exiting". LOL!

If you live in LA, you can just say "I'm in the entertainment industry" and people will leave you alone. That's because everyone uses that line REGARDLESS of what industry they really work in. People just accept that line and move on.

I've got a lot of lines depending on who's asking.

"I sit in a cloth covered box for eight hours a day."
"I work at the Internet."
"I'm in ecommerce."
"I work for eXtremeRestraints.com"
"I sell sex toys and BDSM gear. You know, leather restraints, steel shackles, rubber horse penises, etc..."
Also of course, "I'm in the adult industry?"

I learn the most about people when I tell them that I work at eXtremeRestraints.com, because I learn a lot about them whey they say things like "Oh, I get your newsletter."

The crowd I hang out with tends to introduce me as Sex Toy James, so I don't often pussyfoot around it. Anyway, I love my job.

My family all knows what I do for a living and they are cool with it. My 17 year old brother wants in on the "action" (AFTER he turns 18 in June of course!) and my mom is a member of our website! She's been a flame dame since before I was born and she use to steal all my porn because, as she puts it, the guys in gay porn are hotter to watch! For "outsiders", I am the Director of Marketing for an Internet site. If said correctly, it can be the end all of the discussion, unless I care to divulge more and then I leave the sentence open at the end for them to ask for further details!

lol our bank manager is also a member of cbl :) helps no end of red tape cutting :)

so is my mortgage broker that i have used forever..

but yeah i usually just say website design and leave it at that, til i know them

Like others I start with "internet marketing" and follow up with examples of mainstream affiliate programs I've plugged. I haven't told them about the porn yet.

Tell them you build model airplanes mostly....unless they let you out...lol

Seriously though, coming from an Italian family with a grandmother who seems to live in church,I myself have to sometimes be creative in answering that question without outright bullshitting the person that's asking.

Tell whomever this applies to that you work as an adviser in the entertainment industry. From what I gather, that's what you do anyway being council, and it shouldn't need to be answered in detail because our business is broad enough in definition to directly answer the question without seeming evasive by simply stating you're an adviser in entertainment.