You can shovel my driveway, but no unnatural behavior

[jIgG]

The hypocracy of some people:

From Chicago Tribune help column

Apology might help ease tension in neighborhood

Dear Amy: My husband and I have lived in our quiet suburban Denver neighborhood for six years.

About two years ago two young gay men moved in across the street. They've taken the ugliest, most run-down property in the neighborhood and remodeled and transformed it into the pride of the street.

When it snows, they shovel out my car and are friendly, yet they mostly keep to themselves.

Last month I went out to retrieve my newspaper and watched them kiss each other goodbye and embrace as they each left for work.

I was appalled that they would do something like that in plain view of everyone.

I was so disturbed that I spoke to my pastor. He encouraged me to draft a letter telling them how much we appreciate their help but asking them to refrain from that behavior in our neighborhood.

I did so and asked a few of our neighbors to sign it.

Since I delivered it, I've not been able to get them to even engage me in conversation.

I offer greetings but they've chosen to ignore me.

They have made it so uncomfortable for the other neighbors and me by not even acknowledging our presence.

How would you suggest we open communications with them and explain to them that we value their contributions to the neighborhood but will not tolerate watching unnatural and disturbing behavior.

-- Wondering

Columnist responds:

Dear Wondering: You're lucky that these gentlemen merely choose to ignore you.

Your neighbors could respond to your hospitality by hosting weekly outdoor "gay pride" barbecues and inviting all of their friends to enjoy life on your quiet suburban street.

I can hold out hope that they will choose to do this, but I'm spiteful in that way. Your neighbors sound much more kind.

In your original petition to these men, you basically stated that while you value them when they are raising the standard on your street and shoveling your driveway, you loathe them for being who they are.

The only way to open communication with your neighbors would be to start by apologizing to them for engaging your other neighbors in your campaign. Because you don't sound likely to apologize, you are just going to have to tolerate being ignored.

Found on DailyKos

[DonMike]

That columnist gave such a great answer.

[kcwebwerks]

All that crap over a kiss. And then she has the gall to wonder why her neighbors ignore her. Gawd people are so stupid! If I were the gay couple, I would find the biggest gay pride flag I could find and blanket my house with it. Course someone that stupid would probably just think it as being colorful.

[robin]

You're allowed to be gay if you slave for them but damn don't you dare kiss or share a bit of tenderness to your bf.... typical.

[Marc]

I was appalled that they would do something like that in plain view of everyone.

I was so disturbed that I spoke to my pastor. He encouraged me to draft a letter telling them how much we appreciate their help but asking them to refrain from that behavior in our neighborhood.

I did so and asked a few of our neighbors to sign it.

what a fucking cunt.
If there was ever a need to use the c word, she is it.
I hope she gets into a disfiguring car wreck and has a gay nurse assigned to take care of her

[Marc]

Im sorry that was over the top and I regret saying that. I was just really pissed off at this lady.
You can delete that previous post if you want.

[Xstr8guy]

Im sorry that was over the top and I regret saying that. I was just really pissed off at this lady.
You can delete that previous post if you want.

Nope! That was completely appropriate... it's staying. We NEED to get angry at that kind of intolerance.

[gaybucks_chip]

On the other hand, I have to completely applaud the response by the gay couple.

They *could* have gotten angry, flown a big rainbow flag, hosted a huge gay barbeque... but instead, they chose the most Christian response they possibly could under the circumstances... to turn the other cheek and simply ignore the people that were hurtful.

Obviously, their action was far, far more powerful than getting angry or hosting a leather barbeque would have been, because it so upset this woman that she wrote to a columnist for help. And *that* is where change comes from.

I think that this woman is troubled because she realizes (without admitting it) that what she did was really hurtful and she's probably trying to reconcile what the church is teaching her from what she feels in her heart... that these were really nice neighbors, good neighborhood participants... that she's caused to completely ignore everyone in the neighborhood.

Perhaps the combination of her actions, the response from the columnist, and just thinking about it will cause her to realize it's not her place to judge. After all, Christian teachings warn against any form of judgement, and that's the element that most conservative Christians somehow lose sight of.

[CJ-KJCash]

what a fucking cunt.
If there was ever a need to use the c word, she is it.
I hope she gets into a disfiguring car wreck and has a gay nurse assigned to take care of her

I dont think you were over the top at all Marc. The only thing i might change would be to use a capital C on Cunt.

Amazing how she says they have made it so uncomfortable on her and her neighbours because they refuse to acknowledge her. Wonder if she for one mili-second considered how uncomfortable she made them by making such a bigh deal over a simple fucking kiss.

They love it when we move in and remodel and raise their property values, make the neighbourhood a better place and all, but then I guess we are supposed to pop back in to the SUV and speed out of the area like the boys from Queer Eye.

[Paco]

what a fucking cunt.
If there was ever a need to use the c word, she is it.
I hope she gets into a disfiguring car wreck and has a gay nurse assigned to take care of her

:thumbsup:

Oh, I would simply love it if she found out her husband was enjoying some of the forbidden fruit (no pun intended).

As far as I am concerned, you need not apologize for your anger, after all, you are merely human.
As for her, I have no idea what she is, or what crawled up her and died, but it should have taken her with it!

[DonMike]

On the other hand, I have to completely applaud the response by the gay couple.

They *could* have gotten angry, flown a big rainbow flag, hosted a huge gay barbeque... but instead, they chose the most Christian response they possibly could under the circumstances... to turn the other cheek and simply ignore the people that were hurtful.

Obviously, their action was far, far more powerful than getting angry or hosting a leather barbeque would have been, because it so upset this woman that she wrote to a columnist for help. And *that* is where change comes from.

I think that this woman is troubled because she realizes (without admitting it) that what she did was really hurtful and she's probably trying to reconcile what the church is teaching her from what she feels in her heart... that these were really nice neighbors, good neighborhood participants... that she's caused to completely ignore everyone in the neighborhood.

Perhaps the combination of her actions, the response from the columnist, and just thinking about it will cause her to realize it's not her place to judge. After all, Christian teachings warn against any form of judgement, and that's the element that most conservative Christians somehow lose sight of.

Excellent answer. I totally agree with you. Maybe the woman will never change, but if she is still that stubborn than this will eat away at her more than an in-your-face retaliation. Had the gay couple thrown a big gay party it would have just given the woman more reasons to hate them and to complain to everyone around her about what terrible people they were. She could have said, "FIRST, they kissed each other right out in public, THEN they had this gay party" and completely removed herself from the equation. As it stands now, she's the asshole and any attempt on her part to justify her actions will only go to highlight what an asshole she really is, and I think she knows that. I mean, there is no clean cut way to say "how dare you get angry at me for treating you with such disrespect". And that's realy what this is all about.

[kcwebwerks]

Amazing how she says they have made it so uncomfortable on her and her neighbours because they refuse to acknowledge her. Wonder if she for one mili-second considered how uncomfortable she made them by making such a bigh deal over a simple fucking kiss.

They love it when we move in and remodel and raise their property values, make the neighbourhood a better place and all, but then I guess we are supposed to pop back in to the SUV and speed out of the area like the boys from Queer Eye.

I really doubt that it has crossed her mind how uncomfortable she made them. I'm sure that as far as she is concerned she was completely in the right and was doing her "christian" duty in trying to "save" the perverts.

I can't imagine having neighbors like that. Though I also haven't kissed anyone goodbye in my front yard either. Not that I'm worried about what the neighbors will think, I just prefer a quick kiss at the front door. My neighbors like me, I like them, we get along and help each other. They all know that I'm gay and (at least when I'm standing around) have no problem with me. This is the main reason I chose to keep this big house when my roomate joined the army. I don't need a house this big for just myself and our dogs, but I like the neighborhood too much to leave .

[Jasun]

That columnist gave such a great answer.

Yeah,... but she forgot to add "Bitch" at the end of it.

[rhys]

read her letter... it's all about me, me, me.

empathy is a foreign word to that cunt.

she's obviously completely clueless

i hope the gay couple do throw a pride party when the weather improves...

they can invite her and her pastor too!