How many ways can you say "male masturbation" ?

[Bec]

Next time you're stuck on another way to describe a man masturbating ... check out this list I found on Dictionary of Sexual Terms and Expressions

5-digit-disco
a date with Manuel
a-date-with-Manuela
a-date-with-Senorita-Mano
a-visit-from-Mother-Fist
accosting-the-Oscar-Meyer
activating-cruise-control
addressing-Mr.-Palmer
adjusting-your-set
ambidexterity
answer-the-bone-a-phone
applying-for-a-fishing-liscence
applying-the-hand-brake
arm-aerobics
arm-breaker
armswing
armswinging
arthur
articulate-the-archdeacon
assault-on-a-friendly-weapon
attacking-the-one-eyed-purple-headed-warrior
auditioning-the-hand-puppet
bachelor's-delight
bachelor's-fare
backstroke-roulette
baiting the hook
ball-off
balling-off
balls-deep-into-your-fist
bananas-and-cream
bang-the-banjo
bang-the-bishop
bang-the-wanger
banging-the-drum
bank-with-Barclays
Barclay's-bank
bash-the-bishop
bashing-the-bishop
bashing-the-candle
bashing-the-dummy
bat-off
batting-practice
battling-the-purple-helmeted-warrior
be-your-own-best-friend
beat
beat-it
beat-meat
beat-off
beat-one's-little-brother
beat-Pete
beat-the-bald-headed-bandit
beat-the-bishop
beat-the-dork
beat-the-dummy
beat-the-goose
beat-the-hog
beat-the-meat
beat-the-pud
beat-the-pup
beat-the-tom-tom
beat-your-meat-like-it-owes-you-money
beating-it-with-a-smile-on-your-face
beating-your-meat-on-the-toilet-seat
beating-off
beating-the-bait
beating-the-bed-flute
beating-the-bishop
beating-the-bologna
beating-the-boner
beating-the-meat
beating-the-old-man
beating-the-piss-outta-my-best-friend
beating-the-pud
beating-the-snake
beating-the-stick
beef-stroke-it-off
being your own best-friend
bell-polishing
bequeath-your-genes
best orgasm you'll ever get , the
biffing-off
big-date-with-Rosy-Palms
big-stroke-time
bishoprage
blanket-drill
bleed-the-goose
bleed-the-lizard
bleed-the-weed
bloating-the-vein
blooch
blow-off
blowing your load
blowing-your-own-horn
bludgeon-the-beefsteak
blue-vein-shuffle
bob
bob-the-bologna
bobbing-the-boloney
body-rub
boff
boffer
boffing
bollock-service
bologna-bop
bombing-the-German-helmet
bop
bop-the-baloney
bopping-the-bishop
bopping-the-bologna
bopping-Richard
bopping-the-bonzo
box-the-Jesuit-(and-get-cockroaches)
boxing-the-bald-champ
boxing-the-bald-headed-clown
boxing-the-ballsack
boxing-the-Bozak
boxing-the-clown
boxing-with-Richard
brandle
break-one-off
bring-down-(by-hand)
bring-off-by-hand
bring-up-by-hand
buck-the-bone
bucking-it
buff-the-dog
buff-the-mushroom
buff-the-pylon
buffing (the magic lamp)
buffing-the-bishop
buffing-the-banana
buffing-the-helmet
buffing-the-rifle
buffing-the-wood
buggering-the-hand
burp-the-baldman
burp-the-worm
burping-the-baby
burping-the-worm
bust-a-nut
buttering-the-corn
buttering-the-muffin
cabareting
calling-all-cum
calling-down-for-more-mayo
caning-the-vandal
capturing-the-bishop
carrying-weight
cast off
catch-up-with-Popeye
catching-a-case-of-whackinitis
celebrating-Palm-Sunday
changing-your-oil
charge-the-rod
charm-the-cobra
charm-the-serpent
charming-the-snake
cheat-the-meat
check-the-oil
checking-for-testicular-cancer
cheesing-off
chicken-grabbing
chicken-milking
chipping-wood
choke-hold
choke-the-bad-guy
choke-the-chicken
choke-the-chook
choke-the-gopher
choking-Charlie-'till-he-throws-up
choking-Kojak
choking-the-bald-guy-until-he-pukes
choking-the-chipmunk
choking-the-sheriff-and-waiting-for-the-posse-to-come
chong-your-schlong
chuff
churn
churn butter
churn-the-butter
churning-butter
churning-the-butter
circle-jerk
clamming-the-engram
clamping-the-pipe
clap-with-one-hand
clean-the-pipe(s)
cleaning-the-rifle
cleaning-the-storm-drains
clear-the-custard
clearing-the-snorkel
climbing-the-tree
climbing-Mount-Baldy
clobbering-the-kleenex
closet-frisbee
closing-the-deal
clubbing-eddy
clubbing-the-clam
coating-prince-william-sound-with-love-oil
cock-the-cannon
cock-your-shotgun
colonel-sanders-heimleich-maneuver
color-in-the-coloring-book
come-into-your-own
come-the-turkey
comforting-Gary-Coleman
coming-into-your-own
coming-one's-mutton
coming-to-grips-with-yourself
conking-the-cardinal
consult-Dr.-Jerkoff
converse-with-Harry-Palm
cooking-the-cream-of-cock
corralling-the-tadpoles
couch-hockey-for-one
court-Madam-Knuckle
crab-tease
crack-off-a-batch
cracking-nuts
cracking-off
cracking-the-bat
crank
crank-the-cream
crank-the-cream-separator
crank-the-love-pump
crank-the-monkey
crank-the-shaft
crank-the-shank
cranking-for-cum
cranking-the-corona
cream-your-corn
creamed-beef
creaming-the-cheese
create-an-arch
crimping-the-wire
crown-the-king
cuddling-the-kielbasa
cuff-the-carrot
cuff-the-dummy
cuff-the-meat
cuff-the-puppy
culture-the-American-Blood-Sausage
cum-the-scum
Custer's-last-stand
dance-with-Johnnie-One-eye
dancing-with-myself
dancing-with-the-captain
dash-one's-doodle
date Mother Palm and her five daughters
date-Miss-Michigan
date-Palmala-Handerson
dating-Manuella
dating-Rosie-Palm-and-her-five-sisters
dating-the-Palm-sisters
dating-Thumbalina-and-her-four-sisters
dealing
decongesting-the-weasel
defrosting-the-fridge
devil's-handshake
dicky-whacking
diddle
diddling
diddling-the-dinky
digitally-oscillating-the-penis
dilly-with-the-willy
dinging-the-dong
dinky-the-slinky
discipline-your-soldier
disciplining-the-primate
dishonorable-discharge
disobey-the-Pope
disseminating
diurnal-pollution
do-a-dry-waltz-with-oneself
do-it-yourself
do-the-dew
do-the-Han-Solo
do-the-wet-n-stinky
do-yourself-off
docking-in-shuttle-bay-5
doddle-whacking
doing-a-hand-job
doing-a-little-soft-shoe
doing-battle-with-the-purple-helmeted-warrior-of-love
doing-handiwork
doing-hard-time-in-the-hand-slammer
doing-it-your-way
doing-the-five-knuckle-chuckle
doing-the-five-knuckle-chuckle on the old piss pipe
doing-the-five-knuckle-chuckle on the old piss pump
doing the five-knuckle shuffle
doing-the-five-knuckle-shuffle on the old piss pipe
doing-the-five-knuckle-shuffle on the old piss pump
doing-the-hand-jive
doing-the-human-version-of-autoexec.bat
doing-the-janitor-thing
doing-the-knuckle-shuffle-on-the-ol'-piss-pump
doing-the-pork-sword-jiggle
doing-the-solitary-rhumba
doing-the-white-knuckler
doing-your-own-thing
dollop-the-weener
dong-flogging
doodle-the-noodle
double-jacking
downing-at-the-club-(for-members-only)
drain-Charle's-Dickens
drain-the-vein
drain-the-dragon
draining-the-monster
draining-the-poisons-from-the-building
draw-on-a-length
drilling-for-oil-in-your-own-backyard
driving-the-skin-bus
dropping-a-line
dropping-stomach-pancakes
dry-firing-the-musket
dry-humping-the-ottoman
dual-masturbation
dundering-the-devil
dunk-the-dolphin
dusting-the-old-trophy
educating-Peter
electing-the-president
empty-the-cannon
encapsulate-your-probe
engaging-in-internal-revenue-service
engaging-in-safe-sex
enjoying-yourself
erupting-the-volcano
erupting-Vesuvius
evicting-the-testicular-squatters
excercise-your-rights
experiencing-men-o-paws
express-a-secret-vice
express-yourself-(manually)
faxing-Jimmy-Dean
faxing-the-pope
feed-the-ducks
feed-the-fist
feed-the-spunk-o-meter
feed-the-stick
feeding-the-chooks
feel-in-one's-pocket-for-one's-big-hairy-rocket
fetch-metal
fetch-mettle
fidget-the-midget
fidget-with-the-digit
fight-the-champ
fight-the-turkey
file-the-fun-rod
filling-up-the-belly-button-well
fire-the-hand-cannon
fire-the-wobbly-warhead
fire-your-wad
firing-off-a-round
firing-the-flesh-musket
firing-the-surgeon-general
firm-the-worm
first you grab it by the head then you beat-it till it's dead
fishing-for-trouser-trout
fishing-for-zipper-trout
fist-flick
fist-fuck
fist-fucking
fist-fucking-the-piss-pump
fist-it-off
fist-kebabing-101
fist-of-fury
fist-the-mister
fisting-the-mister
five-against-one
five-against-Willy
five-finger-boogie-on-the-blue-vein
five-finger discount
five-finger-exercise(s)
five-finger-knuckle-shuffle
five-finger-lingo
five-finger-solo
five-fingers-against-one-penis
five-knuckle chuckle
five-knuckle olympics
five-knuckle shuffle
five-knuckle shuffle on the old piss pump
five-knuckle shuffle on the piss pump
five-on-one
fives
fixing the plumbing
flapping-takkie
flaying-the-emperor
flex-one's-sex
flexing Russell the one-eyed love-muscle
flick-the-BIC
flick-on-over-the-thumb
flip-it-around
flip-it-off
flip-off
flip-oneself-off
flipping-the-bishop
flog
flog-(oneself)
flog-a-dead-horse
flog-a-willing-horse
flog-it
flog-the-bishop
flog-the-dog
flog-the-dolphin
flog-the-dong
flog-the-donkey
flog-the-dummy
flog-the-goose
flog-the-hog
flog-the-infidel
flog-the-lizard
flog-the-log
flog-the-meat
flog-the-mutton
flog-the-old-whipping-boy
flog-the-pork
flog-the-pup
flog-the-sausage
flog-the-whipping-boy
flogging the bishop
flogging-the-dog
flogging-the-dolphin
flogging-the-dong
flogging the dummy
flogging-the-frog
flogging-the-hog
flogging-the-mule
flogging the old dog
flogging-the-poodle
flogging-the-salami
flogging-your-dumber-brother
flogging your log
flogging-your-pride
flong-the-dong
flopping-beef
flub-the-dub
flushing babies
flute-solo
fly-fishing
fondling-the-fig
freeing-Willy
frig
frig-off
frig-oneself
frigging
frigging-the-love-muscle
friggit
friggle
frosting-the-pastries
fuck-fist
fuck-the-fist
fuck-your-fist
fuck-off
fuck-one's-fist
fuck-Mary-Fist
fuck-palmala
fucking Miss Michigan
gaining an inch
gallop-the-antelope
gallop-the-goose
gallop-the-maggot
gallop-the-old-lizard
galloping-the-lizard
genital-stimulation-via-phalangetic-motion
genitalic-stimulation-via-phallengetic-motion
get-gravel-for-the-goose
get-one's-nuts-off
get-oneself-off
get-some-self
get-some-trim
get-to-know-yourself
get to the peak of your peker
getting-a-date-with-slick-mittens
getting-a-grip-on-things
getting-a-hold-of-yourself
getting-a-little-off-hand
getting-a-stiffy
getting-chafed
getting gissy with the goo
getting-gnarly-with-the-knudster
getting-in-touch-with-your-manhood
getting-in-touch-with-yourself
getting jiggy (or jizzy) with it
getting-ones-nuts-off
getting-stripped-of-your-grammy
getting-the-german-soldier-marching
getting-the-glue-stick
getting-to-know-yourself
getting-to-know-yourself-personally-in-the-biblical-sense
getting-your-caps-peeled
getting-your-palm-read (or red)
getting-your-palm-read-by-Mister-Softee (or Softy)
getting-your-pole-varnished
gherkin-jerking
gilding-the-lily
give-it-a-one-gun-salute
give-oneself-a-handjob
give-oneself-a-low-five
giving flipper a backrub
giving-it-a-tug
giving-the-general-a-five-finger-salute
giving the pope a stroke
giving-Yul-Brenner-the-high-five
glazing-the-knuckle
gluing-the-lady's-eye-shut
go-a-couple-rounds-with-the-champ(ion)
go-back-to-the-wig-wam-and-beat-the-tom-tom
go-on-a-hand-diet
go-to-war-with-yourself
going-a-couple-of-rounds-with-Ol'-Josh
going-cabareting
going-eye-to-eye-with-Johnny-Hung
going-on-a-date-with-Handrea
going-on-a-date-with-Palmela
going-on-a-date-with-Rosey-Palm-and-the-five-daughters
going-blind
going-on-Peewee's-little-adventure
going-on-the-blow
going-on-the-dole
going-out-with-Mother-Thumb-and-her-four-daughters
going surfing on mount baldy
going with Ms. Thumb & her four daughters
got a date with Rosie Palm(er)
grab-the-flab
grappling-the-gorilla
grasping at the opportunity
grease-the-goofy
greasing-the-flagpole
greasing-the-pipe
greasing-your-bone
grind-off
grinding-the-goo-shooter
grip-it
grip-the-gorilla
grip-the-tip
gripping-Flipper
gripping-the-pencil
growing a tree then chopping it down
growing-hair-on-the-palms
gushing-the-geyser
hack-off
hack-the-hog
hack-the-mack
hair-in-hand
ham-boning
ham-shank
Han-Solo
handball
hand-fuck
hand-gallop
hand-game
hand-gig
hand-head
hand-jig
hand-jive
hand-job
hand-labor
hand-relief
hand-shandy
hand-solo
hand-to-gland-combat
hand-work
handful-of-pleasure,-a
handle
handling the hard-on
hands-on-training
handy-work
hanging-five
hanging-the-old-man
hard-labor
haul-your-own-ashes
have-a-date-with-a-handkerchief
have-a-wank
have-one-off-the-wrist
having-a-ball
having-a-ball ... well, two actually
having-a-conversation-with-the-one-eyed-trouser-snake
having-a-date-with-Fisty-Palmer
having-a-date-with-Rosie-Palm-and-her-five-sisters
having a date with the five-fingered widow
having-a-five-knuckle-shuffle
having-a-ham-shank
having-a-J.-Arthur
having-a-one-night-stand-with-yourself
having-a-roy
having-a-sherman
having a staff-meeting
having-a-tug
having-a-tug-of-war-with-the-cyclops
having-a-whack-attack
having an affair with digits
having-an-arm-wrestle-with-your-one-eyed-vessel
having an intelligent conversation with Dick
having an oscar-meyer moment
having-dinner
having-it-off
having-one-off-the-wrist
having-sex-with-someone-you-love
helping-the-python-shed-its-skin
helping Tom Sawyer white-wash the fence
herkin'-the-gherkin
hit-on-Rosy-Palm
hit-the-ham
hitchhike-under-the-big-top
hitchhiking-to-heaven
hitchhiking-underneath-the-big-top
hold-the-bold
holding-the-sausage-hostage
holding-your-sausage-hostage
holding-my-own
holding-on-to-a-family-heirloom
hone-the-bone
hone the cone
honking-Bobo
hotdog-a-rama
hot-rod-it
housebreaking-the-cat
hug-the-hog
hump-the-horn
hump-the-hose
hump-your-fist
humping-air
humping-the-hose
humping the old hand
hurting-Burt-until-he-squirts
husk-it
ignite-the-lightsaber
in-hand
infanticide
inflating the zepplin
installing-a-burglar-alarm
invading-Poland
ironing-some-wrinkles

[Bec]

jack-and-jill-off-party
jack-hammer
jack-hammering
jack-off
jack-off-party
jack-off-session
jack-the-beanstalk
jack-the-corn
jack-the-joystick
jack-the-sack
jack-your-jizz
jack-yourself
jacking (off)
jacking-the-beanstalk
jag-off
jam-the-joystick
jazz-oneself
jazzing yourself
jeff-off
jerk
jerk-Jamby
jerk-jelly
jerk-job
jerk-off
jerk-the-gherkin
jerk-the-joint
jerk-the-johnson
jerk-the-mutton
jerk-the-rope
jerk-the-Turk
jerk-the-turkey
jerk-up
jerk-your-jewels
jerk-yourself-a-soda
jerkin's-hand-lotion
jerking-jamby
jerking-off
jerking the cherkin
jerking-the-gherkin
jerking-the-noodle
jerking-the-turkey
jerking-the-wheel
jiggle-the-jewelry
jiggling the branch to shake the nuts loose
jiggling-the-dice
jiggling the handle
jiggling-your-cockanballs
jimmying-the-joey
jiring-one's-wad
jizzlobbing
J/O (JO / j.o.)
J/O-scene
Jodrell-Bank
jog-off
jollification
juggling-the-coullions
juice-the-fruit
just hold it right there!
just-jerkin'-it
keep-a-date-with-bobby-palm-and-his-five-brother
keep-down-the-census
keep-the-census-down
kick-the-gong-around
kicking-seamen
killing-45-seconds
killing-it
knead-your-dough
kneading-the-knockwurst
knitting
knob
knob-polishing
knob-shining
knock-on-wood
knuckle-shuffle
knuckle-shuffle-on-the-ol'-piss-pump
knock-the-top-off
knuckling-the-bone
lark
lathering the latin love lance
launching-the-hand-shuttle
launching-the-head-of-a-world-cup-golfer
launching-the-tadpoles
leaking-the-main-drain
Levy-and-Frank
lightening-the-load
lighting-the-candle
lighting-the-pipe
little-pinky-hit-the-slinky
little-southern-romance
loading-the-cannon
local
looking-askance
looking-for-ticks
lope-the-mule
loves labors lost
loving-the-muppet
loving-thy-self
lube-the-cord
lubing-the-tube
lubricating the love-stick
lubricating the piston
M-and-M
maintaining-a-holding-pattern
make-a-bald-man-cry
make-a-milkshake
make-fist-kabobs
make-love-to-ones-fist
make-love-with-Mother-Thumb-and-her-four-daughters
make-love-with-Rosy-Palm-and-her-five-sisters
make-silly-with-the-Willy
make the bald-man puke
making-a-banana-spit
making-a-banana-split
making-a-deposit in the toilet bank of america
making-a-foreskin-cone
making a knuckle hot-dog
making-a-six-fist
making-duck-butter
making-friends-with-Big-Ed
making-instant-pudding
making-love-with-Miss-Right
making mayo
making-nut-butter
making-oyster-soup
making-the-bald-man-cry
making-the-scene-with-the-magazine
making-vanilla-jism-shakes
making-yogurt
making-yourself-at-home
mangling-the-midget
manipulating-the-mango
manning-the-cannon
manning-the-cockpit
manual-exercise(s)
manual-gratification
manual-job
manual-labor
manual-override
manual-persuasion
manual-pollution
manual-preference
manual-release
manual-sex
manual-titillation
manually-assisted-wet-dream
manustupration
manuxorate
masonic-secret-self-handshake
massage-the-fireman's-neck
massage-the-one-eyed-monk
massage-your-muscle
massage-your-purple-headed-warrior
master-bacon
maximize-your-potency
measuring the circumference of your penis
measuring-for-condoms
meet-Mrs.-Palmer-and-her-five-daughters
meet-your-right-hand-man
meeting-Mary-Palm-and-her-five-sisters
meeting-Rosie-Hancock
meeting-with-Mother-Thumb-and-her-four-daughters
messing-with-Moby
milk
milk it
milk-the-chicken
milk-the-lizard
milk-the-maggot
milking-one's-self
milking-the-bull
milking-the-cow
milking-the-moose
milking-the-musket
milking-the-weasel
milkywaying
minding-my-own-business
Miss-Fist
mix-up-a-batch
molesting-the-mole
monkey-slapping
monkey-spanking
mount-a-corporal-and-four
moving-into-a-one-bedroom-apartment
much-goo-about-nothing
mugging the kojak doll
mule-breeding
murder-the-Bishop
mustard-on-the-burger
nerking-the-throbber
night-club
ngocok
noiseless hobby
oiling-the-glove
oiling-the-pogo-stick
Onan's-Olympics
Onan up
onanera
one-eye-target-practice
one-gun-salute
one-hand-clapping
one-handed-clapping
one-legged-race
one man band
one-man-show
one-man-tug-o-war
one-off-the-wrist
one-stick-drum-improvisation
one-two
oscillating-the-Oscar-Meyer
owner operator
pack-the-palm
packaging-the-ol'-sausage
packing-the-palm
paddle-the-pickle
paddling my pork
paddling-the-peter
paddling-the-pickle
paddling-the-robin
paint-the-ceiling
painting-the-pickle
painting-the-walls
palm-it
Palmala-Handerson
palming-the-calm
parading the troops (corporal and five privates)
passing-math
pat-me-muller
pat-the-Robertson
patting the pooter
pause-that-refreshes,-the
paw-paw-tricks
peeling-the-banana
peeling-the-carrot
peeling-some-chilies
performing-a-self-test
performing-an-organ-solo
performing-diagnostics-on-your-mantool
perm-the-poodle
petting-the-lizard
petting the monkey
petting-the-snake
petting-the-Wookie
petting-your-dog
phoning-the-czar
pickle dancing
piddle-the-pud
pinch-the-cat
pink-piston-practice
pipping-the-pumpkin
pitch-a-knuckle-ball
play-a-flute-solo-on-one's-meat-whistle
play-billiards
play-pocket-billiards
play-pocket-pool
play-solitaire
play-the-bones
play-the-male-organ
play-the-piss-pipe
play-the-skin-flute
play-with-oneself
play with (your) Willy Wanker
playing-a-bass-solo
playing-a-little-five-on-one
playing-a-little-game-of-five-on-one
playing-a-one-stringed-guitar
playing-a-solo-on-the-meat-whistle
playing-chopsticks
playing five-against-one
playing-in-a-one-man-show
playing one arm bandit
playing one eyed bandit
playing-peek-a-boo-(with-Mr.-Johnson)
playing-pocket-pinball
playing-pocket-pool
playing rumple foreshin
playing-soapy-Peter
playing-solitaire
playing-tag-with-the-pink-torpedo
playing-the-fiddle
playing-the-flesh-flute
playing-the-flesh-trombone
playing-the-hairy-banjo
playing-the-man-flute
playing-the-one-stringed-melody
playing-the-pink-oboe
playing-the-skin-flute
playing-tug-o-war-with-the-cyclops
playing-uno
playing-with-dick
playing-with-it
playing with my yo yo
playing-with-oneself
playing-with-Susi-Palmer-and-her-five-friends
playing-with-the-pink-Power-Ranger
playing-with-the-spitting-llama
playing-with-the-turtle
playing with the upright organ
playing-with-your-big-Alien
playing with your 6 th finger
playing-Yahtzee
please-the-pisser
pleasing-the-pisser
pleasing the turtle
plucking-the-chicken
plunking-the-twanger
pocket-billiards
pocket-pinball
pocket-polka
pocket-pool
pocket-waltz
point-one's-social-finger
pole-vaulting
polish-the-bayonet
polish-the-chrome-dome
polish-the-horn
polish-the-knob
polish-the-log
polish-the-Oscar
polish-the-pole
polish-the-shooter
polish-the-viper
polishing-Charlie-Brown
polishing-Percy-in-your-palm
polishing-the-beak
polishing the cane
polishing-the-family-jewels
polishing-the-helmet
polishing-the-night-stick
polishing-the-pud
polishing-the-rocket
polishing-the-silver
polishing-the-sword
pollute
popping-a-nut
popping-the-cork
popping-the-purple-pimple
popping-the-zit
Portuguese pump(ing)
posh-wank
pound-it
pound-off
pound-the-bobo
pound-the-flounder
pound-the-meat
pound-the-peenie
pound-the-pork
pound-the-pud
pounding-off
pounding-the-bald-headed-moose
pounding-the-flounder
pounding the pepperoni
pounding-the-pud
pounding-the-pudding
pounding your pud
pow-wow-with-the-one-eyed-Redskin
practicing your mantra
practising
preparing-the-carrot
prime-it
prime-the-pump
prime-the-womb-cannon
priming-the-pump
prodding-the-half-cooked-pastrami
prompt-the-porpoise
prostate-maintenance
prune-the-fifth-limb
pub-the-dub
pud-pulling
pud-wrestling
pudwhacking
puff-the-one-eyed-dragon
pull it off
pull-off
pull-one-off
pull-one's-dong
pull-one's-joint
pull-one's-pud
pull-one's-wang
pull-oneself-off
pull-putz
pull-some-lumber
pull the ducks neck
pull-the-joint
pull-the-peter
pull-the-pope
pull-the-pork
pull-the-pudding
pull-the-pud
pull-the-pin
pull-the-pole
pull-the-root
pull-the-taffy
pull-the-wire
pull-wire
pull-your-prick
pulling-a-solo-session
pulling-on-Peter
pulling-off
pulling-rank
pulling-rank on private one-eye
pulling-the-bologna-pony
pulling the bull
pulling-the-carrot
pulling-the-colonel-sanders-heimleich-manuever
pulling-the-five-knuckle-shuffle
pulling-the-cord
pulling-the-goalie
pulling-the-handbrake
pulling-the-mule
pulling-the-pole
pulling-the-pope
pulling-the-pud
pulling-the-putz
pulling-the-taffy
pulling-the-weed
pulling-the-wire
pulling-your-prick
pulling-your-goalie
pulling-your-own-leg
pummel-the-love-truncheon
pummeling-the-priest
pump-off
pump-oneself-off
pump-one's-pickle
pump-ship
pump-the-monkey
pump-the-python
pumping-cream
pumping-for-pleasure
pumping-for-power
pumping-the-electric-goo-gun
pumping-the-gas-at-the-self-service-island
pumping-the-stump
punchin'-the-munchkin
punching-the-clown
punching-the-puppet
punish-Percy-in-the-palm
punish-the-Harlequin
punishing-the-pope
pushing-the-daisy-and-make-it-cum
qualifying-in-the-testicular-time-trial
R2-your-D2
raise-the-flag
raising-Lazarus-from-the-dead
raising-the-mainsail
rake-your-meat
ram-the-ham
rank
rapid-one-arm-pull-ups
raping your hand
ravage-the-innocent
reading-poetry
reading-with-one-hand
relieve-oneself
relieving oneself
relieving-tension
returning-to-sender
ride-the-great-white-knuckler
riding-the-great-white-knuckler
ringing-for-the-elevator
rise and fall of Peter the Great, the
roasting-chestnuts
rod-walloping
rodgering
rodding
rogering
rolling-your-own
rolling-the-fleshy-blunt
Roman-helmet-rumba
romancing-Lady-Five-Fingers
romancing-the-bone
Romeo-and-himself
ropin' the long horn
roping-the-pony
roping-the-pope
roughing-up-the-suspect
rowing-the-boat
rub
rub-it-off
rub-off
rub-off-by-hand
rub-one-out
rub one's...
rub oneself
rub-the-knob
rub-the-(little)-head
rub-the-magic-lamp
rub-the-radish
rub-the-tub
rub-up
rubbing one off
rubbing-one-out
rubbing-the-magic-one-eyed-wonder-weasel
rubbing-the-pink-eraser
rubbing-the-rod
run-a-batch
run-one's-hand-up-the-flagpole
run-off-by-hand
running a batch (off by hand)
running-off-a-batch-by-hand
running-Peter-through-two-a-days
running-the-cheeta
running-the-100-yard-dash
running-the-whack-a-thon
sacrificing-sperm-to-the-god-of-lonely-nights
sailors'-joy
salute-the-sailor
saluting Captain Winky
saluting the commander
saluting the general
sanding-the-banister
sanding the woody
sanding-wood
schnauzer-shuffleboard
schplitzing-the-schmeckel
scouring-the-tower-of-power
scraping-the-horn
screw-off
se-branler
se-crosser
se-faire-les-cinq-doigts-de-la-main
se-passer-un-poignet
secret-handshake
secret-indulgence
secret-sin
secret-vice
see-Madam(e)-Thumb-and-her-four-daughters
self-inflicted-intercourse
self-induced-penile-regurgitation
serta-solo
setting-off-a-depth-charge
sew
sewing-circle
shag
shagging
shake
shake-hands-with-the-governor
shake-hands-with-the-wife's-best-friend
shake-it-up
shake-the-snake
shake-the-weasel
shaking-hands-with-Abraham-Lincoln
shaking-hands-with-Jack-Mcnasty
shaking-hands-with-Little-Elvis
shaking-hands-with-Mr.-Happy
shaking-hands-with-Mr.-President
shaking hands with Mr. Winkie
shaking-hands-with-Shorty
shaking-hands-with-the-General
shaking-hands-with-the-guy-that-stood-up-when-I-got-married
shaking-hands-with-the-midget
shaking-hands-with-the-wife's-best-friend
shaking-hands-with-the-unemployed
shaking-hands-with-your-John-Thomas
shaking-hands-with-Yul-Brenner
shaking-the-bottle
shaking-the-dice
shaking the dew off the water lily
shaking-the-hand-of-the-self-employed
shaking-the-hand-of-the-unemployed
shaking-the-sauce
shaking-the-snake
shaking-the-sausage
shaking-your-fist-at-the-sky
shaking-your-hand-at-the-sky
shaking-your-(own)-maracas
shanking
share-one's-bed
share a/the sexual-embrace
sharpening the beaver-cleaver
sharpening the pencil
she-bop
shellacking-the-shellaleigh
shemping-the-hog
Sherman
Sherman-tank
shift-gears
shifting-gears
shifting-into-first-gear
shine-the-pole
shining-the-helmet
shining-the-pole
shining-the-pork-sword
shining the shaft
shoot-between-wind-and-water
shoot-in-the-tail
shoot-skeet
shoot-the-cat
shooting-flies
shooting-for-the-moon
shooting-putty-at-the-moon
shooting-tadpoles-at-the-moon
short-strokes
shuck-the-corn
shuffle one out
shuffle-the-deck
simmulation
simple-infanticide
sing-with-Rosie
sing-an-aria
single-dingles
skanking the pickle
skeet-shooting
skin-the-bone
skin-the-lizard
slaking-the-bacon
slam-the-ham
slam-the-spam
slamming-the-ham
slamming-the-hammer
slamming-the-salami
slamming-the-salmon
slamming-the-spam
slap-boxing the one-eyed champ
slap-the-hammer
slap-the-little-head
slap-the-wapper
slapping-high-fives-with-Yul-Brynner
slapping-it
slapping-pappy
slapping-the-big-nosed-rasta-man
slapping-the-Cap'n
slapping-the-carrot
slapping-the-clown
slapping-the-donkey
slapping-the-fleshgopher
slapping-the-pud
slapping-the-purple-headed-yogurt-pistol
slapping-the-salami
slaughter-of-the-innocent
slaying-the-one-eyed-monster
slicking the willy
slide-the-shaft
slimmer
sling-one's-jelly
sling-one's-juice
slinging-the-jelly
slipping-yourself-a-mickey
slog-the-log
slopping-the-hogs
sloppy-sign-language
smacking-off
smacking-the-oompa-loompa
smacking-the-salami
smacking-the-sausage
smacking-the-weasel
smacking-your-sister
smash-the-stake
smoking-hooch-with-reagan
smoking the marlboro man
snap
snap-the-rubber
snapping-one-off
snapping-the-carrot
snapping-the-monkey
snapping-the-rubber
snapping-the-twig
snapping-the-whip
snuggle-the-nozzle
soldier's-joy
solitary-vice
solitary-sin
solo-flight
solo-marathon
solo-sex
solo-spit
spackling-the-ceiling
spam-wham
spank-the-bishop
spank-the-carrot
spank-the-hangdown
spank-the-little-boy
spank-the-wank
spank-the-wife's-best-friend
spanking-cheetah
spanking-Elvis
spanking-the-bishop
spanking-the-frank
spanking-the-monkey
spanking-the-salami
spear-chucking
sperm manicure, the
spit-polishing-the-purple-helmet
spit-one-off
spit-the-seeds
spraying-the-spectators
spreading-the-mayo
spunk-the-monk
spunking
squeeze-it-off
squeeze-off
squeezing-the-cheese
squeezing the cream (filling) from the (flesh) twinkie
squeezing-the-creamy-filter
squeezing-the-juice
squeezing-the-lemon
squeezing-the-squid
squeezing-the-weasel
squirt-n-spurt
squirt-one-off
squirt-seed
squirting-the-seed
stacking-the-deck
staff-meeting
stir-the-stew
stirring-the-batter
straddle-the-paddle
strain-the-main-vein
strain-the-vein
straining-the-spaghetti
strangle-Kojak .
strangle-the-dangle
strangle-the-stogie
strangle-Yoda
strangling-the-serpent
stretching-the-muscle
stretching the silly putty
strike-the-pink-match
stroke
stroke-off
stroke-oneself
stroke-the-beef
stroke-the-bloke
stroke-the-dog
stroke-the-lizard
stroke-the-poker
stroke-the-purple-nosed-gusset-ferret
stroke-the-stallion
stroke-the-string
stroke-the-Wookie
stroke-your-ego
strokem-your-scrotum
stroking-it
stroking-off
stroking-the-dog
stroking-the-loaf
stroking-the-lizard
stroking-the-mole
stroking-the-one-eyed-burping-gecko
stroking-the-poker
stroking-the-satin-headed-serpent
stroking-the-schlong
stroking-the-scoobie
stroking-the-squirmin'-german
stroking-the-twinkie
stroking-the-wiener
stropping-the-beak
stropping-the-mulligan
strum-the-ol'-banjo
strumming-the-banjo
suffocate-the-organ
summon-the-genie
summoning-the-semen-demon
surfing-on-the-Milky-Highway
Swedish
sweep-off
swordfighting
syphon-the-python

[Bec]

taffy-tugger
taffy-pulling-contest
take-a-beating
take-a-load-off-your-mind
take-a-ride-on-the-mean-spanking-machine
take-Captain-Picard-to-warp-speed
take-down-(by-hand)
take-in-hand
take-matters-into-your-own-hands
take-ol'-stiff-neck-to-the-movies
take-oneself-in-hand
taking-a-nap
taking-a-shake-break
taking-care-of-business
taking-Herman-to-the-circus
taking-matters-into-one's-own-hands
taking-ol'-one-eye-through-the-fly
taking-part-in-population-control
taking-some-time-off
taking-the-Jocelyn-Elders-midterm
taking-the-monster-for-a-one-armed-ride
talking-quietly-to-yourself
tame-the-bald-headed-mouse
tame-the-beef-weasel
tame-the-monster
taming-the-animal
taming-the-shrew
taming the snake
tango-con-mano
tap-dance
tap-dancing
taunting-the-one-eyed-weasel
TCB
teach-our-children-to-fly
teach-your-dog-to-spit
teach-Yule-Brenner-some-respect
tease-the-python
teasing-the-weenie
teasing-the-weasel
tee-off
tenderizing-the-meat
tenderizing-the-tube-steak
tenderizing your piece of pork
test-the-flashlight
testicular-tensile-strength-test
testing old faithful
testing out the magic love wand
testing-the-batteries
testing-the-testicles
that-crazy-hand-jive
there's always a solution at hand
thrap(e)
thrapping
throttle-kojak
throttle-the-turkey
throw-the-ball-around
throwing-(one)
thump-the-pump
thump-the-pumper
tickle one's cock
tickle-the-pickle
tickling old-one-eye
tickling-the-one-eyed-weasel
tickling-the-pickle
tonking
toot-the-flute
tooting-the-horn
torking-the-fork
torking-the-power-rod
torment-the-trouser-trout
torquing-the-taliwacker
torquing-the-wrench
torturing-the-tentacle
toss-him-off
toss-it-off
toss-off
toss-the-boss
tossing-off
tossing-the-caber
tossing-the-ham-javelin
tossing-the-salad
tossing-the-snag
tossing-the-turkey
tossing-yogurt
train-the-love-porpoise
treating-yourself-right
triborgasmia
trolling-for-flames
tromboning
trouser-olympics
trouser-snake-CPR
trying-to-make-One-Eyed-Willy-puke
trying to pull something off
tug-o-war with the (ol') cyclops
tugging-the-slug
tugging-the-tapioca-tube
tuning-the-fork
tuning-the-horn
turn-the-knob
turning-japanese
turning-on,-tuning-in-and-dropping-out
tussle with your muscle
twang-the-wire
tweak-the-twiddle
tweak-the-twinkie
tweaking-the-twinkie
twirl-the-squirrel
twist-the-turnip
twisting-the-crank
twisting-the-piston
twisting-the-tool
unclog-the-pipes
unclogging-the-sink
unleash-the-fury
unloading-passengers-from-the-five-car-train
unloading-the-gun
Uncle-Frank
unrolling the turtle neck
unsheathing-the-pork-sword
unsheathing the shlong
uprooting-the-big-mushroom
using the force (on Darth Vader)
vanilla puke session
varnish-one's-cane
varnish-the-cane
varnish-the-pole
varnish-the-stick
varnishing-the-flagpole
verifying your manhood
violating-the-hedge-hog
visit-Mary-Thumb-and-her-four-daughters
visit-Mrs.-Palm-and-her-5-daughters
visit-Rosy-Palm-and-her-five-daughters
visiting Merry (or Mary) Palmer
visiting Mother Thumb and her four daughters
visiting-the-notary-public
wack (off)
wack-the-weasel
wack-your-squack
wacker
wacking-off
wacking-the-one-eyed-worm
wacking-the-weasel
wacking-the-willie
wacking-Wee-Willie-Wonka
wackomatic
waking-the-dead
walk-the-dog
walking-old-one-eye
walking the bearded one-eyed love dog
walking-the-dog
walking the one eyed dog
walking-the-paraket
walking-the-plank
walking-the-snake
walking-Willie-the-one-eyed-wonder-worm
wallop-the-sausage
wallop-the-weiner
waltz-with-Willy
wang-off
wank
wank-off
wank-on-it
wank-the-crank
wanker-the-anchor
wanking-(off)
wanking-one-eyed-Willy
wanking-the-one-eyed-wonder-worm
wanking-the-scube
wanking-with-the-one-eyed-wonder-weasel
wapping-your-weenie
warming-up-the-altar-boys'-dinner
wash-the-cosh
washing-the-goose's-neck
washing-the-hog
washing-the-lighthouse
washing-the-meat
waste-a-short-time
waste-time
wasting-babies
watch-the-eyelid-movies
wave-the-wand
waving-the-magic-wand
wax-the-beam
wax-the-bean
wax-the-board
wax-the-Buick
wax-the-candle-stick
wax-the-carrot
wax-the-dolphin
wax-the-womb-broom
waxing-the-car
waxing-the-carrot
waxing the pole
waxing-the-surfboard
waxing-the-t-bird
wearing-a-fat-guys-slacks
whack
whack-it
whack-little-Mac
whack-off
whack-the-bishop
whack-the-pud
whack-the-yak
whack-your-Magic-Johnson
whacking-it
whacking-off
whacking the one-eyed-worm
whacking-the-weasel
whacking-Wee-Willie-Winkie
whacking-willy
whacking your pud
whank
whank-off
whank-pit
whipping the snot out of one-eyed goofy
whiffing-an-easy-fairway-shot
whip-it
whip-off
whip-the-cat
whip-the-devil
whip-the-dripper
whip-the-dummy
whip-the-weenie
whip-the-wire
whip-the-worm
whipping-dripping
whipping-off
whipping-the-bishop
whipping-the-dripper
whipping-the-dummy
whipping-the-one-eyed-trouser-snake
whipping the pony
whipping the rat
whipping-the-stiff
whipping-the-weasel
whipping-the-wire
whipping up some baby batter
whipping-up-some-sour-cream
whipping-Willy-the-one-eyed-wonder-worm
whipping-your-Willy
white-water wristing
whittle-the-wood
whittling-Dixie
whittling-the-stick
whiz-the-jizzum
whizzing-jism
whizzing-the-jism
whizzing the jizzum
wienering
wiggling-the-worm
Willie-and-the-hand-jive
Willy Wonkin'
winding-the-jack-in-the-box
winding-the-Wurlitzer
windsurf-on-Mount-Baldy
winning a taffy-pulling-contest
wobbling my woodle
wonk-your-conker
work (oneself) off
workin'-the-jerkin
working-in-the-garden
working-off
working-off-a-batch
working-out-a-stiff-joint
working-your-willy
worshiping-the-finger-prince
worshiping-the-fist-prince
worshipping the white god of seed
wrench-off
wrestle-the-bald-headed-champion
wrestle-the-cyclops
wrestling-the-bald(-headed)-champion
wrestling-the-cyclops
wrestling-the-eel
wrestling-the-one-eyed-monster
wrestling-the-purple-headed-warrior
wrestling the snake
wrestling-with-the-bald(-headed)-champ
wrestling-with-the-blue-veined-custard-chucker
wring-the-rattlesnake
wringing (the cheesy bell)
wringing-out-the-rope
wrist-aerobics
wrist-job
wrist-off
wristing
yang-the-wang
yank
yank-off
yank-the-crank
yank-the-dork
yank-the-doodle
yank-the-plank
yank-the-shlong
yank-the-strap
yank-the-wang
yank-the-Yoda
yank-the-yak
yank-the-yam
yank-your-strap
yank-your-wank
yank-yourself-(off)
Yankee-your-Wankee
yanking the penal cord
yanking-the-plank
yanking-the-yoyo
yanking
yanking-off
yanking-the-crank
yucking your choad

[robin]

:crazyeyes: Oh my -- it's the mother of all lists!

[Chilihost]

some of these are just too funny like pumping-the-gas-at-the-self-service-island :fool:

[Togm]

LOL..........some new ones there.

[gaybucks_chip]

I often use the WorldWideWank.com's list of synonyms, located at

http://www.worldwidewank.com/synonyms2.html

but I think Bec's list has a few entries that even that list doesn't have

Kudos!!

[maxpower]

Ya I might have to pick a few of these names up for feeders :scissors: