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One gay New York City man has taken serosorting to a new level with plans for separate sex parties for HIV-positive and HIV-negative men.
Robert Brandon Sandor, who’s 48 and has been HIV-positive since 1983, founded poz4poz.com in frustration a decade ago because he felt gay men with HIV were social outcasts, both in society in general and even in the gay community where, in the days before anti-retroviral drugs, they were shunned.
“There was nothing around then,” Sandor says. “There was a sense of total banishment. Everyone wanted us on an island. Society couldn’t accept us on any level.”
After several years of what he calls successful sex parties in the Big Apple for gay, HIV-positive men, it started to dawn on Sandor that the same strategy could work for gay men who are negative. This fall he started a spin-off site, HIV-UB2. It’s linked to poz4poz.com. The group's first gathering is scheduled for Dec. 7 in New York.
............ “It’s very simple,” Sandor says. “If you’re HIV-negative and you have sex with another HIV-negative man, with or without a condom, you will stay HIV-negative. I guarantee it. If you are HIV-positive and you only have sex with other positive men, you will not infect any HIV-negative men. And unsafe sex between two positive men won’t get anyone new infected with HIV.”
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Has anyone else ever heard of HIV- sex parties before? Do you think this is a good idea? It seems to me to be the same problem of people possibly being infected after a test, or am I off?
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