if your parents voted for bush

[jIgG]

my boyfriend's parents voted for Bush, and say so, the whole religious bullshit thing and morallity stuff.

i told him if it was me i'd tell them they're not welcomed here and to go stay with his brother when they come down here.

too radical?

[Lee]

Yeah its their choice nothing to punish them for :thumbsup:

Regards,

Lee

[jIgG]

yeah but voting for Bush is like telling him he can't marry/have civil union


i feel kinda angry about it, good thing they're not around now

[Dzinerbear]

I understand your anger, and it's certainly justified. It's hard to know how to handle this. Years ago, when my parents wouldn't shift on the gay thing, I removed them from my life for a couple of years. No contact, none. When I reinitiated contact to see if they shifted, they had.

Sometimes people need good, strong reasons to change their belief systems.

Cheers
Dzinerbear

[jIgG]

oh i know there won't be any shifts, considering his mom hasn't talk to his sister in more than 15 years

but i've considered their actions fair game so from now on i might turn the bitch mode on and forget about the "be nice" thing

:whip:

[RainGurl]

hmm... sounds to me like there is a lot more anger there than just them voting for bush.... if you had a great relationship with them and trashed it because of their politcal views, that would be pretty radical. But, I'm guessing there is more to it than that....

my girlfriend's mother voted for bush, but she is still welcomed here. we just secretly posted an "I'm voting for Kerry" on the back of her car on election day =)

My mom is a former hippie liberal turned republican as well. I think it has more to do with her new husband than her true politcal beliefs, though. I won't hold it against her, though.

[Rainbo1956]

Originally posted by RainGurl


my girlfriend's mother voted for bush, but she is still welcomed here. we just secretly posted an "I'm voting for Kerry" on the back of her car on election day =)

That's funny!

About what else yousaid as well...I agree.
It sounds like there's more to it then just who they voted for.

And remember, there were even webmasters on here that were going to vote for Bush.

Everyone has their own reasons why they voted the way they did...
I don't like the fact that someone in our industry voted for him, but, I wouldn't stop speaking to them just for that reason.

I've no doubt that my partners father voted for Bush too...
Shit, he's a citizen, but he can hardly speak or read english and he's been here for 50 years!
Still love the old man though

[CJ-KJCash]

Well, I can understand your frustration.I am originally from Ohio and as much as it pains me to admit, my whole family voted for him and have been quite smug about it. Nothing I can do about it tho, I still love them, just from 10000 miles away.

And i told them that i just wonder how long it will be before the fire up the ovens for my kind........

One again, expectations met and hopes disappointed.......

I'm also sure that they helped bring in the Constutional Hatred that prevents me from ever being able to marry my partner there, but they wont admit to that.I guess they think i might take that a little more personally.

But the joke's on them cause I'm not coming back anyway.

[DigitalJay]

When me and my bf went to his rents, his mom cheered and yelled "Bush won!" and when he said "that means we won't be able to get married" she laughed and said "yes I know" hahahaha....oh

I won't hold it against her though, part of living here is knowing everyone has every right to their own opinion, even if their opinion infringes on the rights of other people, even when those rights don't affect or infringe on the rights of other people...

[jIgG]

i dont know, it ticks me off
my parents would never ever vote for Bush if they were here. My mom can't even understand how his parents would support him.

When I came out at first, she was reprehensible about me telling others I was gay, then when she started meeting my boyfriends all changed. To them it's always more important for me to be happy than for them to get what they want

of course there's more to it, my bf's parents being religious I'm seeing the hypocracy about everything first hand. it's like this huge desire everything on the outside to be as perfect as possible. Wrap yourself in the bible and pretend you're a good christian and follow what the pasto says, nevermind that what you do the other 99.999% of your life is anything but christian

[Jasun]

Originally posted by DigitalJay
When me and my bf went to his rents, his mom cheered and yelled "Bush won!" and when he said "that means we won't be able to get married" she laughed and said "yes I know" hahahaha....oh

I won't hold it against her though, part of living here is knowing everyone has every right to their own opinion, even if their opinion infringes on the rights of other people, even when those rights don't affect or infringe on the rights of other people...

See, dude, if someone.. family or not.. gave me a "NyaNYa in your face" answer like that, they'd get a smack in the mouth. 60 year old woman or not. The assualt charge would be worth it. Fuck her. You've either got higher tollerance than me, or lower self-esteem. Nobody talks to me like that.

Nobody.

If my parents voted for Bush, I'd write them a very short letter to tell them that they'd made their chioce, and that they'd never see me again.

I'm not kidding. When I came out, my parents freaked, treated me like shit and said they hoped the grandparents would die before they found out. I told them they'd get their wish, and never once replied to one of their letters, returned their calls or accepted their gifts. They all died thinking I hated them, and when my mother tear-eyed told me this, I told her it was her fault and no one else's. She was horrified that I had actaully gone through with that for what she called a "petty reason", but when I explained to her that I had now hurt her as much as she'd hurt me, she didn't know what to say.

My parents are now very active in the gay community out on the East Coast, being facilitators for PFLAG and members of the gay community outreach, We maintain a very polite relationship now, and that's it. They're pretty much out of my life, and no amount of them saving gay kids now will ever make up for the shit they put me through when I was 19.

[basschick]

i am very torn on this issue. perhaps letting someone who strongly believes in things that are harmful to you think that's fine is not a great message.

we are desparately angry, hurt, depressed by the results of this election. does it make sense not to at least express this to people who supported it?

maybe AT LEAST they need to have it explained like this "you voted to take away a basic right from me and anyone like me. that's not okay. if you really love me and accept me as a person, you should consider what your vote taking away this basic human right means to me."

for the mom who laughed, i'd have to explain to her as briefly as possible why i would not be speaking to her for a while - which i wouldn't. i think laughing at something that hurts someone is showing exactly no empathy - which is pretty much what conservatives are about. they really HAVE no empathy. they don't understand that 100,000 dead civilians were actual human beings. they don't really undestand that gay people are human beings, nor black people, and in many cases, women.

at least get your message out there to these people - anyone who truly loves you and accepts you wouldn't vote against gay marriage. if they really feel that YOU getting married would be that terrible, don't fool yourself - they DON'T accept who you are. they believe you have less rights than they or they believe that legalizing your love union is an abomination that threatens the country. you are seeing acceptance where there is none.

[DigitalJay]

She thinks that Bush is crusading to bring the freedoms that we enjoy to everyone else, and that that is worth more than if I can or can't get married. She also thinks I would be spoiled, stupid, and selfish to base my vote on something as personal as marraige compared to the human rights and freedoms of other countries. I don't agree with her at all and I don't think she knows a fraction of what she is talking about, but neither do I.

I couldn't and wouldn't hit her, she's beat the crap outta me before though. Stuff gets me down and upsets me but dosn't really piss me off because I've accepted it I guess.

Being gay has never affected me in any drastic negative way so I can't relate to it and I have no right to comment on it really. I've always been proud of who I am, and society as a whole may try, but individuals never really try to take that away from me personally. I really do have self-esteem and very little baggage, it makes it really hard to relate to almost everyone I meet. I need to be chewed up and spit out a few times to really get it I guess.

I hate that most gay men I've met have had to go through so much shit, and most still are going through plenty. It all comes down to sexual descrimination in the end, being judged or told what you can or can't/should or shouldn't do based on what is between your legs. If women can work toward ending it and succeed more and more every day, so can we, and the battle is well worth it.

[DigitalJay]

ps - my last comment wasn't meant to insenuate that glbt's don't fight for their rights, or aren't doing a good enough job, etc, just that it is and does pay off, for glbt's and everyone else that is opressed.

[Fister]

As a general rule, I support continued conversation and engagement with relatives, if you can afford it emotionally. Over time, people may change...notice how different Jasun's parents are now.