>1. Blaming your farts on me... not funny... not funny at all!
>2. Yelling at me for barking ... I'M A FRIGGIN' DOG!
>3. Taking me for walks, then not letting me check stuff out. Exactly
whose walk is this anyway?
>4. Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose ... stop it!
>5. Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew
your stuff up when you're not home.
>6. The slight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! Whoooo
Hoooooooo -- what a proud moment for the top of the food chain.
>7. Taking me to the vet for the "big snip", then acting surprised when I
freak out every time we go back!
>8. Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry, but I
haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.
>9. Dog sweaters. Hello? Haven't you noticed the fur?
>10. How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know the
truth, you're just jealous.
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