Well I'll throw in my two cents here.

A lot of boards are indeed just plain boring and many of the 'straight' one's do tolerate gay topics, but many do have an underlying homophobia as well.

For myself, and this is merely my opinion, I find that AdultWebmasterHangout is a relatively gay friendly place but it does deal in some networking, good SE/Traffic discussions but not a whole lot of AEN stuff. Mainly I think because not many of the members are that hardcore into it. However it does have good resources, good discussions on a myriad of business issues.

Also bentboard which is new is more in depth and will I think be very gay friendly as its being run by that naughty aussie CuriousToyBoy who really is a hoot.

I also think that the more we participate in those straight boards, the more we can learn and teach them as well. After all a lot of straights run or partake (or attempt to) in the gay market. From a business viewpoint its worthwhile to take them into account and not limit our participation to just 'gay' boards.

Like i said, merely my two cents worth

Ian