Quote:
Originally Posted by BDBionic
I dunno what's worse. Intolerant locals...

... or higher-than-thou tourists who judge the locals according to the standards they brought with 'em on the plane.



Less than a week ago, you chastised me on this board for comments and preconceptions about someone i knew little about based solely on my perception of what he said in his posts...and you were right...i was wrong.
Now here you are calling me a "higher than thou tourist who judges locals according to standards they brought with 'em on the plane" and an "intollerant local". You know NOTHING of my travel habits sir, you know NOTHING of the way i handled myself with this concierge. You are out of line, and this comment is not only inappropriate, it is as judgmental of me as you are claiming I was of this concierge and the Vietnamese people....how dare you and shame on you for these comments based upon things you know nothing about.



Quote:
Originally Posted by bdbionic
Yeah he's the concierge at a 4-star hotel. Which is why he felt he was providing a service in notifying you of what he perceived to be something worth knowing about. It's obviously a sensitive and, again, taboo issue there yet he diregarded the potential awkardness of it all to give you information he felt would be useful to you.



Which I, being very seasoned in travel, realized and the thing you don't know is my response to him upon receiving the warning was "thank you for your concern, I think I will be safe if i walk, have a good night".. Wow, very judgemental there i would think!


Quote:
Originally Posted by bdbionic
Maybe the Westerners staying at a hotel in a foreign country should be a little more culturally sensitive to that country, rather than get offended when the people that work there aren't sensitive to cultures many thousands of miles away.



I happen to be a very cultuarlly sensitive person and bend over backwards to appreciate, understand and conform my actions to the culture and society I am in. Thank you for your very inaccurate assumptions that I am not. You could not be more wrong.

My comments relate to the experience, the comment, the thought, the meaning behind the comment, and yes i know exactly what it is born of and why it was said, and i know exactly the motivation of the concierge was for my benefit, however it does not mitigate the reality that the comment was predjudiced against gay people. Whether it is of government teaching, family background, cultural non acceptance, or other issues, it still was a predjudicial comment, and while i know it was not personal, it still was a situation i thought worth sharing to others to point out that all is not as rosy in the world as we see it in the gay community in western countries.

My comments had absolutely NOTHING to do with judging anyone. I did not berate him for his job, I did not call him names, I did not belittle the people of Vietnam, I simply related an experience of gay predjudice, that i experienced on a gay board, to a gay forum, to gay readers, for the purpose of pointing out that there are other predjudicial views to our lifestyle.

I further point out that i said in the subject of my original post, " a funny thing happened on the way to a gay bar" which first of all does not indicate any displeasure, or anger, or unpleasantry with the situation at all. I did not say "those stupid people" or "some dumb concierge" or "an ignorant concierge said to me" ... the post was about the experience, the words, the perception, the discrimination. And whether it is born of culture, or family, or government, or education, it is still discrimination by it's utterance and to shed light on it and discuss it on this board in no way is acting "higher than thou" toward these people.



Quote:
Originally Posted by bdbionic
But what I personally feel is the point it turned in to an unpleasant experience for you was when you subjected homegrown expectations upon a man from a different culture, society and country. In his own culture, society and country, no less.



I did not subject him to anything, i did not lecture him on what he should or should not say. I did not tell him this was unacceptable but I probably should have. I did not get angry with him. I did not complain to his superiors, I thanked him and walked away. I accepted this as part of his culture, as part of his way of life, his viewpoint... but discussing it here, on this board, this forum, one that is supposed to be about gay issues, promoting gay acceptance, is in NO WAY being culturally insensitive, nor trying to subject my views on another culture. They were posted for sharing to a group that is gay, for gay rights, for gay acceptance, and certainly for ending gay discrimination around the world simply based upon our sexual preference.


Quote:
Originally Posted by bdbionic
Where's the tolerance for his different perspective and experience? Or those of an entirely different country, no less?



Gosh, using this logic we should never discuss any gay discrimination we experience for fear we might be perceived as subjecting others to our culture and being culturally insensitive. Using your logic all is rosy in the world and we should just accept any discriminations we experience because it's their culture? Using their logic we should stop shedding light on experiences of gay discrimination if they happen in remote parts of the world and just accept that as the way it is..... using your logic we shoudl probably go back to the drag queens in NYC 30 years ago on Christopher street and ask them where is the tolerance for the different perspective and experience of the police, the government, in that city. We should chastise them for subjecting their culture on the city of New York and being offended that they were raided when they tried to go to places that catered to their lifestyle. Using your logic we should forget about championing gay rights, acceptance and an end to discrimination around the world, we should just accept it as part of their culture, get over it and move on.

If you go to a small town in the USA, a farming community, and calls you a faggot, or makes off handed comments about gay people to you, do you stand up and say, I am sorry, that is not acceptable? Or do you just accept that it is part of their culture in that little town, and that you should not subject "homegrown expectations upon a man from a different culture, society......In his own culture, society" and town, no less?