Is this too much for a model repsonse letter?

OK, I feel like I got WAY too carried away typing, and maybe most of this can go out the window before being thrown into a model's face prior to meeting. Let me know what you think I should trim, add, or edit. This is exact text to be used in an email response to a model advertisement:

First, a little background on my business:

I started out as a webmaster who works with all-male adult content, promoting websites mainly with image galleries. Lately I have noticed a rather dry content offering in certain markets and niches - some of which literally require a scavenger hunt to find. To me, that is unacceptable in an online world with literally hundreds of male-oriented adult sites. That is why I have decided to step into the role of content producer and create what is not so readily available, yet I feel is highly sought after.

Model types and work sought after:
This is the biggest and most important factor of my work since it pertains to you, my potential model, and what exactly will transpire on the day of the shoot. As you should know, models come in all shapes and sizes, and consumer tastes and preferences vary in even more distinct ways. As such, not everyone will fit the profile that satisfies my modeling requirements. The reason? In today's world of fierce competition, model saturation, and the ever-changing demands of the market, there is simply no room for "general, all-purpose, or basic" adult content. It is everywhere, on every website and magazine. There are things that consumers specifically want to see, and it is up to me to provide them with that content. Of course, it is up to you to provide me with the eye candy they want to see.

Model types - I prefer real men who are beefy, muscular, hairy, and/or athletic. A few extra pounds is never a problem as I stay away from underage-looking waif-like boys known as "chickens."

Again, your willingness and openness to the experience will determine the likelihood of a successful, in-demand photo set.

How it works:
Basically, I work for a broker--an agency that represents me and my work. I take the photos and select the final sets. They take care of any and all marketing, distribution, sales and payment transactions. As such, they require a hefty chunk of those sales dollars. It saves me from having to hire staff and work extra hard to promote and sell my stuff and still handle customer issues. But of course all of those savings are funneled into the broker's fees. After income tax, self-employment tax, cost of goods and other operational expenses, it's hard to see where the "easy money" is made. Perhaps 10 years ago it was a lot easier and more profitable, but in the end... what I realize is that I am doing this work to serve a demand. A demand from a market that includes myself and is not something I dove into for the far-fetched dream of instant profits and wealth. I do this becauase I
enjoy it, and I want others to know that I am working to produce the kinds of products they want.

Compensation:
Cash - Everyone's favorite. I do not price photo sessions by the hour. If I offered someone $100 an hour, you can bet that some people will take their time in the changing room, and then demand that extra $25 when the shoot goes 15 minutes over schedule. Cash is mainly the option for one-time photo shoots where models spend no time fiddling with annual income or taxes.

Trade for Portfolio - Believe it or not, the value of a well done portfolio can far exceed the value of cash in-hand. What is a portfolio? It is your modeling history and a tool that accentuates your strongest features. Those looking to move past the small studio and into the big players' league in Los Angeles depend on a portfolio to get them there. A portfolio includes a CD of your best photos, and a dozen full quality prints in a showcase binder - in exchange for the shoot. No money is exchanged.

Contract modeling - If you would like to be made available for callbacks, casting calls, pay bonuses, and exclusive photo sets (meaning only 1 customer buys your photos for his site, but he calls all the shots for what he needs in these poses), then this is the option for you. A pay bonus basically means that when your photos are in demand and I exceed my sales goals by a certain percentage or dollar amount, you get a bonus. It's extra money just for being available.

Time and scheduling:
My at-home studio is currently under remodel and will not be complete until the end of November. If you are interested in a photo shoot prior to the Thanksgiving holiday, I am more than willing to travel to you, up to 40 miles standard or up to 125 miles with a small deposit. This fee is refunded immediately during the shoot, which covers would-be expenses for cancellations or no-shows if they arise. If you are interested in having me
travel, which makes for a more comfortable setting for you, all I require is a simple layout with solid colors. A bed, a chair, the couch, the floor... as long as the area is clutter-free and does not have loud, flamboyant colors we should be fine.

What I need from you next:
Once we agree to meet, we can discuss exactly what we expect from each other, what you can offer me in your poses, and what I can offer you in return in compensation. But I need to know that everything in this statement applies to you and to what degree. Some models are more reserved about what they will and will not do. Just remember as I stated above, this is a world of fierce competition, model saturation, and market demand. There is little room for general content, and consumers have proven that models are only worth what the consumer is willing to buy.

I look forward to seeing and reading from you soon!!. This is a very exciting venture that I am stepping into, and I know I will be able to work with fantastic models. Hopefully you will be one of them!

Take care,

Ricardo

Depends on whether this is a first response or a "closer" response, and whom your target models are.

If you're going after twinks, they will NEVER read that much. I can't speak for the other models, but I doubt most people would want to read that much either.

If it's a first response, I'd make the entire thing maybe 2-3 paragraphs. If it's a "closer" email, then it can be longer, but I still think it should be probably 30-40% shorter than it is.

You might consider putting up even a janky model recruiting page and put all of the stuff in the letter up there for those who want all the detail they can get. Use descriptive headlines at the top of each paragraph topic, and maybe make an "executive summary" of just a sentence about each paragraph which you put at the top of the page for the attention-span-impaired.

First, a little background on my business:

I started out as a webmaster who works with all-male adult content, ("Content" is an industry term. "photos and video" would be more clear.) promoting websites mainly with image galleries.(Another industry statement.) Lately I have noticed a rather dry content offering in certain markets and niches (And again) - some of which literally require a scavenger hunt to find. To me, that is unacceptable in an online world with literally hundreds of male-oriented adult sites. That is why I have decided to step into the role of content producer and create what is not so readily available, yet I feel is highly sought after.

Model types and work sought after:
This is the biggest and most important factor of my work since it pertains to you, my potential model, and what exactly will transpire on the day of the shoot. As you should know, models come in all shapes and sizes, and consumer tastes and preferences vary in even more distinct ways. As such, not everyone will fit the profile that satisfies my modeling requirements. The reason? In today's world of fierce competition, model saturation, and the ever-changing demands of the market, there is simply no room for "general, all-purpose, or basic" adult content. It is everywhere, on every website and magazine. There are things that consumers specifically want to see, and it is up to me to provide them with that content. Of course, it is up to you to provide me with the eye candy they want to see. (This paragraph was pointless. Besides, it reads like industry discussion board text.)

Model types - I prefer real men who are beefy, muscular, hairy, and/or athletic. A few extra pounds is never a problem as I stay away from underage-looking waif-like boys known as "chickens."

Again, your willingness and openness to the experience will determine the likelihood of a successful, in-demand photo set. (What does this have to do with the shoot itself from the model's standpoint? Nothing. Unless you add that good models may be called back for more work.)

How it works:
Basically, I work for a broker--an agency that represents me and my work. I take the photos and select the final sets. They take care of any and all marketing, distribution, sales and payment transactions. As such, they require a hefty chunk of those sales dollars. It saves me from having to hire staff and work extra hard to promote and sell my stuff and still handle customer issues. But of course all of those savings are funneled into the broker's fees. After income tax, self-employment tax, cost of goods and other operational expenses, it's hard to see where the "easy money" is made. (Yet more business stuff that models don't care about.) Perhaps 10 years ago it was a lot easier and more profitable (So what you are doing isn't profitable? That must mean you can't pay a lot and that the model should move on.), but in the end... what I realize is that I am doing this work to serve a demand. A demand from a market that includes myself and is not something I dove into for the far-fetched dream of instant profits and wealth. I do this becauase I enjoy it, and I want others to know that I am working to produce the kinds of products they want. (Is this in your autobiography too? They don't care.)

Compensation:
Cash - Everyone's favorite. I do not price photo sessions by the hour. If I offered someone $100 an hour, you can bet that some people will take their time in the changing room, and then demand that extra $25 when the shoot goes 15 minutes over schedule. Cash is mainly the option for one-time photo shoots where models spend no time fiddling with annual income or taxes. (I see your lips moving but I don't hear you talking. At least say you offer competitive wages.)

Trade for Portfolio - Believe it or not, the value of a well done portfolio can far exceed the value of cash in-hand. What is a portfolio? It is your modeling history and a tool that accentuates your strongest features. Those looking to move past the small studio and into the big players' league in Los Angeles depend on a portfolio to get them there. A portfolio includes a CD of your best photos, and a dozen full quality prints in a showcase binder - in exchange for the shoot. No money is exchanged. (Copies of their work over being paid. How many people go for something like this?)

Contract modeling - If you would like to be made available for callbacks, casting calls, pay bonuses, and exclusive photo sets (meaning only 1 customer buys your photos for his site, but he calls all the shots for what he needs in these poses), then this is the option for you. A pay bonus basically means that when your photos are in demand and I exceed my sales goals by a certain percentage or dollar amount, you get a bonus. It's extra money just for being available. (May want to explain this a little more clearly.)

Time and scheduling:
My at-home studio is currently under remodel and will not be complete until the end of November. If you are interested in a photo shoot prior to the Thanksgiving holiday, I am more than willing to travel to you, up to 40 miles standard or up to 125 miles with a small deposit. (I wouldn't openly talk about this deposit policy unless it comes up. There is no way to make "pay me to work for me" sound good.) This fee is refunded immediately during the shoot, which covers would-be expenses for cancellations or no-shows if they arise. If you are interested in having me travel, which makes for a more comfortable setting for you, all I require is a simple layout with solid colors. A bed, a chair, the couch, the floor... as long as the area is clutter-free and does not have loud, flamboyant colors we should be fine.

What I need from you next:
Once we agree to meet, we can discuss exactly what we expect from each other, what you can offer me in your poses, and what I can offer you in return in compensation. (Could cause confusion. Sounds like you want to meet first, talk about money second.) But I need to know that everything in this statement applies to you and to what degree. Some models are more reserved about what they will and will not do. Just remember as I stated above, this is a world of fierce competition, model saturation, and market demand. There is little room for general content, and consumers have proven that models are only worth what the consumer is willing to buy. (More industry stuff. Strike all of it.)

I look forward to seeing and reading from you soon!!. This is a very exciting venture that I am stepping into (May not want to disclose up front that you are new at this.), and I know I will be able to work with fantastic models. Hopefully you will be one of them!

Take care,

Ricardo

Matt's made some very good suggestions here.

I would echo the business in particular about trade-for-portfolio. What I hear from our models is that every creepy old "wanna-be-porn-photographer" offers TFP and models are generally pretty savvy that it's a scam that totally benefits the photographer. I would suggest leaving it out, as it makes you sound small-time.

wow, we can't get our muscle guys to read enough half the time to get to the second paragraph of our 2 paragraph ad. it's beyond half of them to read the part about "send your height and weight". i imagine you will intimidate half your potential models with all that text, and most of the rest won't read at least half of it.

to be fair, i once wrote a 3 paragraph email to our old host and he responded to only 2 paragraphs. when i wrote back to get an answer to my last question, he had apparently overlooked paragraph 3 entirely. and he was neither a model nor in any way stupid.

i've also long since discovered that while text sells sites better, too much text unsells it.

good luck with your model page!

Edit it waaaaayyyyy down.

1) Here's what we are looking for (body types, age, hardcore, solo, etc)

2) This is what we pay... or don't pay. Despite what Matt26z says, many models will work for free or for deferred compensation... especially the specific types you are looking for. There are lots of hairy/mature men that are total exhibitionists. Just take a look at bigmusclebear.com, bear411.com, etc. In fact, those places are excellent for recruiting models.

3) This is how it works (photo ID and release, alias name, what the model can expect on shoot day... douche for an anal scene, shave or don't shave, how long it takes, etc.)

4) What we will do with your work (will appear in print, on web, on DVD, etc.)

I agree with Matt26z. Keep all of the inside industry stuff out of the letter and don't editorialize about stuff the potential model won't care about. Save that for your webmaster customers... we like to hear that!

Btw, I'm VERY excited to see some of your work! I will certainly be a devoted customer if you can deliver some hot hairy men at reasonable prices!!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Rimmates.com

[B]A few extra pounds is never a problem as I stay away from underage-looking waif-like boys known as "chickens."

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I think we stopped using the word "chicken" in the 1970's. And do you really need to take a cheap shot at the twink market in your modeling info? Almost sounds like an encyclopedia entry. Just raggin' on ya here...

I'd put the "this is how it works on shoot day" in another email entirely.

When we hire models, we work out the basic details, then send a "housekeeping" document along with the model agreement which covers all the "take an enema, don't get trashed the night before the shoot, don't show up high, etc" stuff

Quote:

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Originally Posted by citiboyz

I think we stopped using the word "chicken" in the 1970's. And do you really need to take a cheap shot at the twink market in your modeling info? Almost sounds like an encyclopedia entry. Just raggin' on ya here...

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I find it refreshing that someone wants to photograph model types other than cute young things. Sure the market for twink content is much bigger but so is the competition. ;)

Btw, here's our model info page http://www.uknakedmen.com/modelforus.html

Quote:

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Originally Posted by gaybucks_chip

I'd put the "this is how it works on shoot day" in another email entirely.

When we hire models, we work out the basic details, then send a "housekeeping" document along with the model agreement which covers all the "take an enema, don't get trashed the night before the shoot, don't show up high, etc" stuff

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Ah... good point. Probably too much information. ;)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Xstr8guy

Btw, I'm VERY excited to see some of your work! I will certainly be a devoted customer if you can deliver some hot hairy men at reasonable prices!!

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Thanks! I knew you'd like that part.

The paragraphs have been edited but not completely to all of Matt's suggestions. I was asked about how things work, and what exactly is involved, so I felt some insider info was needed - but yeah that was a lot.

One thing to remember - I was the only listing for male models on the whole website I advertised on. Cleveland is crazy about girls, girls, girls. I guess it must be crazy to think that anyone would want to take pictures of a man, so people think this must be a joke or something. I am amazed at how little advertising there is for male models.

Anyhow, most of the other details mentioned get talked about in person. It's easier to make people feel comfortable about pay when talking face to face rather than throwing out numbers without meeting in person. I plan to do the whole website thing where I put all of the details in categories online, but this is my first shoot and I don't have all the gory details. Once I experience my first 2 or 3 model shoots, I will have a lot more to explain and detail. If things go wrong, I'll be prepared next time.

Sorry about the chicken shot, but I have to define my workforce. Gosh, I just had a nightmare last night that some super skinny guy replied with his pictures and I didn't have the heart to say "sorry..." so I just ignored his email. If that happened for real, I dunno... I'd rather they not inquire I guess. And to me, there is a difference between twink and chicken. Twink=youth, smooth, cute. I don't mind the look, most of them are hot but I don't want 2257 issues with young boys who look under 21. Chicken=thin, blonde, pale. Nothing about that attracts me. That's just my opinion though. I get the same way when people say "I don't like Asians" and I think, that's crazy... but most tend to be severely underweight anyhow.

Thanks for the advice. Let's all try to be helpful and supportive rather than be overly critical. I'll be sure to post my models' intro shots in a few weeks once I get things going. In the meantime, I'll be over at Model Mayhem checking things out.

QUOTE=Matt 26z

(This paragraph was pointless. Besides, it reads like industry discussion board text.)
Really? I thought it was important. I don't do general, and they need to know that. If someone wants to stand naked in front of a camera and get paid, forget it. I expect models to say "I don't do that..." and I tell them "I don't not do that so sorry..."

(Is this in your autobiography too? They don't care.)
I started this because it's something I want to do, not something I need to. Yes, they need to know this.

(I see your lips moving but I don't hear you talking. At least say you offer competitive wages.)
I offer competitive wages.

(May want to explain this a little more clearly.)
I talk about contract modeling in person. Only so many details I can give when this is my first shoot.


(I wouldn't openly talk about this deposit policy unless it comes up. There is no way to make "pay me to work for me" sound good.)
You forgot the read the next line: this fee is refunded immediately during the shoot. They don't pay anything, I'm just covering my ass.


(Could cause confusion. Sounds like you want to meet first, talk about money second.)
I do. I'm not telling anyone what I pay them until I see some good pictures and I hear from them. I prefer meeting in person over disclosing unsure facts.

(More industry stuff. Strike all of it.)
Only repeating that I don't do general. I'm not letting models boss me around. This is not their shoot. This is my shoot. I can find other models if people don't want to do certain things. If they have stipulations, we need to work them out, but if they flat out refuse to do my niche style, they're out.

I just needed to explain myself more.

Thanks

It was a great explanation, but for your purpose definately needs to be shortened!!

When dealing with models I've learned that being direct the best policy. In fact, the explanation of you next to last paragraph, explaining that it's your shoot! I would use your explanation in the letter -- it made you sound as if you mean business! I hate it when people waste my time by sugar coating everything! You are right about, "if they won't do it someone else will"....so instead of wasting time finding out that a model thinks they're in control -- leave no room for confusion, then they will know its your shoot!! That's more time you could spend taking pictures! ;)

If you happen to get any twinky guys and you don't want to deal with 'em, you can just say that you don't have any present opportunities for them but you know another agency that does and then give 'em my email (chip at mrconline dot net) and we'll either see if we can work with 'em or pass them on to someone else who might be able to. We have a bazillion people in our database (about 400 who were interested in adult work, last I looked) and we currently refer off to other people who need models. As soon as we get around to it, we're going to make the database accessible to industry people we know who are looking for models... it's one of those deals where everyone will benefit.