Quote Originally Posted by LiveTwinksCam View Post
Ken just wasn't thinking and I am sure that will never happen again. I think at one point in time we all put our foot in our mouth. He deals with gossip and that kind of stuff daily, I think him posting in here he didn't think anything about it because we are all so comfortable in here. People who really know you, love you and that's all that matters. The post wrote about you wasn't believable anyway. ((hugs))
Thanx for the support, Jacob. I truly appreciate your words. It gives me hope that maybe there are cool people left in this industry yet.

And you're right; I wasn't thinking. The email came through, I thought, "Wait a minute; this can't be true!" and because of how ludicrous it sounded, my first thought was to share and say "What the hell is THIS???" Many press releases come to us from personal email addresses, so I didn't even think about it. Obviously, that was my mistake, and I feel just terrible about it.

But as you said, at one point in time we all put our foot in our mouths. What's incredibly disheartening to me is the hostility that I've seen in this thread. Once again, I find myself shocked, saddened and appalled at the vehemence with which this crowd of people attack their own kind without regard to history or benefit of the doubt.

For the past two years, I have done nothing but show good intentions to everyone on this board. I have gone out of my way to make sure that people feel included in AVN Online. I have given them press and attention in a space they felt left out of, and did so without regard to whether or not they were supporting AVN Online in return by advertising with us or even coming to our shows. I have gone above and beyond the call of duty to reach out to these people even when they would consistently trash AVN Online--which was often. And I have made sure that the stories that I wrote about these people were factual and objective.

If one mistake on my part in all that time is grounds for dismissing me as having "lost all credibilty," then I truly wonder about what kinds of people I have put so much effort into reaching out to. Frankly, if anyone is willing to write me off that quickly for ONE indiscretion, that says a hell of a lot more about their character than it does mine.

What I also find ironic is how just a short time ago, this very board was littered with rumor, conjecture and heresay about AVN Online's involvement in the GPF development. People were posting inaccurate information left and right based on no more than what they'd heard via the grapevine, and in some cases, stuff they'd completely made up. I find it hyprocritical that anyone would call into question my professionalism or credibility when they themselves acted in a manner that was wildly inappropriate. But then again, I suppose I should expect such behavior by now. It seems to be rather par for the course here.

As I said before on the board and in my personal letter of apology to Bill, I simply made an error in judgment. End of story. Frankly, I'm shocked that anyone even suspect that there was any malicious intent on my part, given my history in this industry. It just proves to me once again that I'm dealing with a group of people who think it is their job to serve as the moral compass for all that is right and wrong, yet who refuse to hold themselves up to those same standards. That, to me, is what is truly awful here.

I stand by my apology, which I extended to Bill and to the board with deep sincerity and regret for my mistake, but I stand by my reputation, and I refuse to be judged in such a vile way by a group of people who, frankly, who do not support me as I have supported them--and who hold less and less importance in my life as they continue to show their true colors.

And that is my final word on this matter.