You've got PLENTY of video and I think starting it out in total darkness for about 15 second with voice over would be fine... then fade in the video with the voice over.

You can take about half of that text out, some of it is just plain silly. That whole bit about the martial arts and the house and you're pretty fly for a white guy has nothing to do with the video and takes away from the whole thing.

Done right it would be a really dramatic beginning.