First let me preface my reply by saying this…a question was asked and I stated my opinion. No offense was meant as I posted.

However, in response to basschick, I put forth these last thoughts. When an adult decides to stay in the closet what message is being sent to the gay youth of our world? Does it say that if you want that nice job, lie? If you want a family and children, lie? If you want your life to be less complicated, lie? If you want your friends and family to always love you, lie?

I’m sorry, but when an adult makes those kinds of decisions, what does it say about their character?

My own life would have been so much easier if I had just kept my mouth shut and lied, just like society wanted me to. When do we say, enough? When do we get to live our lives just like everyone else? I’ll tell you when…when we stop allowing antiquated notions of what is expectable and normal govern who we are.

You mentioned people killing themselves because coming out could lead them to being alone, that’s not entirely true. I’ve know countless gay people who came out and lost their biological family only to turn around and find that they had a gay family there with them to get them through the rough times.

And gaybucks_chip…the guy is hiding his porn stash and doesn’t come out for fear of hurting his family. Has it not occurred to anyone that he maybe shouldn’t have lied and gotten married in the first place? Maybe his family won’t be crushed finding out he’s gay, but they probably will be really hurt to know that their husband and father has been living a lie all his life.

I think that if gay folks want to be treated just like their heterosexual counter-parts, then they need to stop acting as if being gay is something shameful…something to keep hidden.

Knowing your gay and still marrying a woman, setting up house with her and having babies without telling her is not the way to go about gaining equal rights, it’s dishonest and selfish. These are two characteristics the gay community as a whole could do without.

I’ll stop myself now; I like being a member of this community and would not like to jeopardize that.

Once again I apologize to anyone I have offended.